‘I was 18 when I had my first child. Now, I’m Mother of the Bride. I am not wearing shapewear. My love for eating and my disdain for Spandex imprisonment rail against it.’

“I’m only 44, so I don’t want some flowy, champagne-colored gown with a bespangled bodice. I’m at least 20 years away from that outfit. Of course, va-va-voom is out. It’s my daughter’s day and I’m not much of a bombshell anyhow. I want to look nice, but not come-hither.”