adoptee

‘I was 14 and pregnant. ‘Would you be willing to meet?’ 9 years after she was born, my birth daughter’s family encouraged her to hug me. I didn’t want to let go.’: Woman shares perspective as an adopted child, birth mom, and adoptive mom

“I chose an amazing woman to be the mother of the child I birthed. And yet, I no longer knew how to approach her. Nine years after placing my daughter the adoption agency called me with news that would change the rest of my life. My birth daughter’s family had contacted them to see if I would be willing to meet.”

‘My youngest was called the n-word in kindergarten. He’s been told his skin is the color of poop. Someone yelled a racial epithet at us from a truck.’: Adoptive mom addresses the ‘wide mouthed, gaping stares’ her mixed-race family gets from strangers

“Raising a child of a different race was overwhelming. I hate to even admit how I once accidentally shaved his toddler head bald before desperately seeking out a Black barber. But slowly, we learned what products worked on his skin and hair. We stepped out of our comfort zone. When I share how I have two 20-year-old’s and a 10-year-old, people ask if the 20-year-old’s are twins, or they comment on the age gap. I know my older two keep things from me. I worry about the safety of all three of them.”

‘You are GOOD FOR NOTHING!’ I sat in the bathroom, crying, asking, ‘Please, send me a new dad. Please!’: Young man creates his own adopted ‘family’ after surviving traumatic childhood, ‘We may not have the same bloodline, but they gave me life’

“My dad was the disciplinarian at home. DO NOT MAKE DAD ANGRY. I don’t remember hearing ‘I love you.’ From my dad. Ever. He was brought up in the traditional ‘macho’ way. He’d constantly tell me, ‘I had it MUCH worse than you growing up!’ But then something really weird began to happen at school – it made me feel warm and fuzzy. I was validated and encouraged by teachers. Wait, what? A hurricane of hormones was wreaking havoc on me. I was an angry teen who needed to fill the hole in my heart.”

‘I’m not going to sugar coat it. His file is so big, no one will even look at it anymore.’ He was pencil thin, eyes sunken so deep. He was ours.’: Couple adopts 16-year-old runaway after his birth mom called police on him, ‘His story didn’t end how the world told him it would’

“She was dancing around the facts, and we could tell. She wanted to see if we would scare. He’d run from his previous placement, was failing all of his classes. She had no other place to turn. We asked to FaceTime him. We saw the emptiness in his eyes and the face of a kid who didn’t even know what hope was. He couldn’t make eye contact. His skin was covered with sores, his hands curled and tremored. He was 15. He was ours. He told us the drugs he’d done, the girls he’d been with, and the things he’d seen, and I couldn’t help but see the beginnings of a boy who would leave that past behind.”

‘People would make jokes about my sister. ‘You can date her since she’s not your REAL sister.’: Korean adoptee reveals the impact racism had on his teenage years, says ‘If I could go back in time, I would speak up’

“As an Asian American child in a ‘white person land,’ I would get picked on as a kid at school for looking different. Megan experienced the same Asian jokes and discrimination I did during childhood. The moment of me proposing is such a blur. I think I blacked out!”

‘The surgeon ran a plumbing snake through my insides. We were left haggard, anxious. It was our first wedding anniversary.’: Woman learns of infertility after infection, chooses adoption instead of IVF, ‘Like magic, it all became clear’

“At 24, I’d been married to Peter less than a year. ‘Are you alright?’ I must’ve looked flush. My knees gave out. As I stepped toward the waiting room, time slowed to a crawl. Heaving sobs came next. ‘Oh honey,’ she whispered. ‘I am so sorry.’”

‘I see you peeking!’ He slowly opened his eyes, blinking up at us. His tiny hand closed around my husband’s finger. Our hearts were forever changed.’: Couple adopts after surprise pregnancy, ‘I welcome every ounce of chaos and noise’

“‘Let’s not get our hopes up,’ I told my husband after the shock of the positive pregnancy settled in. He nodded in agreement. But then I received a very unexpected phone call. ‘Jeanette, do you want to be a mother?’ I realized what was about to happen and halted the conversation. ‘Wait!’ I shouted. ‘Can I three-way Zach onto this call?’ I quickly dialed him. Zach was in shock. I had not prepped him. The same week we miscarried our first child, our future son was conceived.”

‘You’re my best friend!’ She cupped my face with her hands, and I was hooked.’: Single foster mom adopts daughter after ‘bump in the road’ delays finalization, ‘she is safe, she is loved, she is home’

“‘Would you be interested in adopting your foster daughter?’ For me, it wasn’t a question. The first day she walked into our house, she was home. Every day they would ask, ‘Is today our adoption day?’ But we then hit a bump in the road. I tried to keep my emotions in check. I can only describe Katherine’s journey as a roller coaster. But she is safe, she is loved, and she is home.”

‘Is he a drug baby?’ I heard the whispers. ‘You’re making a huge mistake.’: Southern woman adopts African American child in ‘little town known for racial divides,’ aims to break stigmas, ‘I want my children to be inclusive, kind’

“On a holiday weekend, we received a call. ‘A baby boy is in the hospital and needs a home.’ I was scared to say yes. Just 3 hours later, a car pulled in our driveway with a 6-pound, 3-day old, baby boy. Time stood still. She handed him to me with two Walmart bags of random items, some paperwork and wished us well. We had no idea what the future would hold. Everything about this decision looked crazy to most people – even us.”

‘Shut the hell up! Is this for real? Oh my Lord, I can’t believe this!’ I was screaming, trying not to hyperventilate.’: Couple adopts ‘angel’-faced daughter from young birth parents, ‘it was a sign’

“It was 4:55 pm. ‘I’m going upstairs to wait for her call,’ I told my family. I walked into my bedroom and flopped on my bed. My fears got the best of me. I couldn’t handle another heartbreak. There is no way we’d be chosen. How could we? We are older, we have 3 children. They wanted to help a childless couple. I laid in the fetal position in my bed, rocking back and forth, feeling nauseous. The phone rang. Was I hearing this correctly?”

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