“They come from a really, really hard place. The kind of abuse you think can’t be real. They duck for cover. You’ve heard of fight or flight? There is also freeze. One of my kids responds with ‘freeze.’ Her eyes grow wide and her voice silences. It’s how she’s trained herself to survive. My kids need to know you are safe.”
‘When they flinch from the stapler dropping, it’s because they weren’t sure if you’re throwing it at them.’: Foster mom pens powerful note to teacher warning of her children’s trauma
‘You don’t belong here and your color is awful!,’ a child said to my 5-year-old African American son on his first day of school.’: Mom worries for her adopted children at school this year, says despite ‘all the goodness, there is hurt’
“Before he even stepped foot into his new classroom, a child on the playground came up to him. At age 5, my son had to come home and tell our family this as we sat around the dinner table. I had to look away so he wouldn’t see my tears.”
‘Please,’ they begged. ‘Would you take in a newborn, just for the weekend?’ I knew my husband would say no.’: Foster mom adopts ‘special little boy,’ is forever grateful for her son ‘who almost wasn’t’
“I could literally hear water balloons whizzing over my husband’s head. ‘What?!! Are you crazy? Heck No!’ I expected this. But I couldn’t let it go. I pictured this baby alone, in need of someone to hold him, to help him feel safe. ‘Please honey, just consider it,’ I urged. ‘It’s only for the weekend!’ Around 9 p.m., there was a knock on my door. ‘We’ll take good care of you this weekend, little guy.’ I snuggled him softly.”
‘I started to panic. I told my friend we were having this child regardless. ‘Would you really?,’ she responded.’: Mom grateful for taking the ‘scenic route’ with son diagnosed with Down syndrome
“I was home alone. I completely broke down after this phone call. A part of me believed he didn’t have it. Maybe a part of me just wished he didn’t have it. ‘Look at him,’ my husband told me. ‘Think of how hard he fought to be here. He is the best thing to ever happen to us, and we have this under control.’ As long as we all had each other, we would live the best life – and I believed him.”
‘We are not your ‘typical’ family. We are white parents with a black child.’: Mom sends heartfelt letter to teacher ‘advocating’ for her black son this school year
“Eli is usually the only black student in his classroom. We are not a ‘colorblind’ family. Eli’s hair is a big part of who he is and how he expresses himself. Please don’t let anyone touch it without his permission. Please provide him with colored paper, pencils or markers that represents his skin color. Not many teachers in our small town think about this subject.”
‘My daughter’s friends told her they don’t like ‘those’ people. I’ve witnessed parents make their children leave the playground when my Black son showed up.’
“I can’t believe I was blind to this for so long. I know this makes my white friends uncomfortable. I am embarrassed it took my child being treated poorly for me to listen. But what I now know, I can’t unknow.”
‘A little boy saw you and yelled, ‘You’re brown, you’re not supposed to be brown!’ My heart dropped to the floor. You had the most innocent look on your face.’
“The boy’s mom quickly said, ‘He is brown, but he’s beautiful.’ The little boy yelled again, ‘No, he’s not. He’s NOT beautiful, because he’s brown!’ In the moment, I couldn’t even open my mouth.”
‘His teacher suddenly jumped on the desk. He started walking across each one, to make sure every single eye was on him.’
“I’ll never forget when he had them throw their history books on the ground and tell them how they got it all wrong that day, and made choices that would come back to haunt them.”
‘Mom! You are white and I am brown, and that means Martin made it so you could adopt me!’ He grabbed his little brother’s hand. ‘Look! Martin’s dream came true.’
“He was 4 the first time kids told him he couldn’t play with them on the playground because he was black. I wasn’t prepared for any of it.”
‘When he was born I heard, ‘Oh my God. He has RED HAIR!’ I paused. ‘No, just wash him a few times.’ The nurse washed him 3 times. ‘No mama, you’ve got a little ginger.’
“Trust me, I was shocked too. I can’t count how many times I had to explain he wasn’t adopted, wasn’t my stepson, and wasn’t albino. That I was his mom – not the aunt, Godmother, or the nanny.”
