“What I didn’t expect was a visit from the fire crew that was on scene and who, like true heroes, tried to save that baby’s life. They came in together, stood before me and asked if we could all share a hug.”
‘I took a call of a baby not breathing. It’s the dreaded call. I heard the baby crying. It was short lived. I hung my head and tried to clear the lump from my throat.’
‘I’m so happy, but honestly a little confused. I really thought we were going to have twins… Exactly one month later, we were contacted by our second attorney. I just knew someone was missing.’
“I knew I couldn’t sit around and wait any longer. The feeling was urgent. Our baby needed us now and no one was going to fight harder for that baby to join our family than me.”
‘I wish I could prepare you for the news you’ll receive just hours after snapping this blissful picture. I know you’ve been worried about the size of your happy baby’s belly.’
“He’s such a happy, calm baby. He’s never been sick, so you know there has to be an easy solution to whatever is causing his belly to appear big… A simple solution that may bring a few small moments of fear and discomfort, but after that, all will be fine.”
‘He was just gone. I came home one night to the apartment my boyfriend and I shared to find everything was missing. He terminated our lease and emptied our joint bank account.’
“Just a few weeks later, I woke up one morning feeling ‘different.’ I really can’t explain it, because it didn’t make any sense. But something in me, knew. I sat shaking with a pregnancy test in my hands. My body was barely functioning. But against all odds, two pink lines appeared.”
‘Ten weeks. That’s when I found out I was having twins. 11 weeks, when I was guaranteed I wouldn’t be having twins. ‘Baby B is not going to make it. You’re putting Baby A in serious jeopardy.’
“They must’ve thought I was crazy. I didn’t cry. I didn’t even hardly react, other than to adamantly stick with my gut. I was pregnant with 2 LIVING babies. I sure as hell wasn’t going to just cut the cord because it sounded like a good idea.”
‘I was raised not to have sex before marriage, and now I am unwed and pregnant. I sat in the bathroom alone and terrified.’
“I found out he was seeing another woman and everything came crashing down. I ruined myself all for someone who never loved me.”
‘I laid awake at night, my stomach in knots, terrified it was the boy embryo that took. I couldn’t even picture raising a boy. It brought me to tears. Full blown survivor’s guilt.’
“Gender disappointment after overcoming infertility? I felt awful. I felt selfish. I was mad at the fact there was a perfect little boy growing inside me. How could I be so greedy? So privileged? Women are yearning for a healthy baby, and I’m crying over…well, sex organs.”
‘I was prepared for surgery. Panic took over. I counted the tiles on the floor to keep from having a major panic attack. All I could think about were my two sweet babies at home. 3. 2. 1…and I was asleep.’
“It was a quiet dinner; not many words were exchanged. We just sat together and acknowledged what was coming. He held my hand and made sure I drank and ate whatever I wanted. When we were done, I went home to feelings of intense physical pain. I didn’t want to go to the ER. I just had to wait.”
‘Oh! You’re a 7. Let’s see what happens if you push.’ We were hurried back into the delivery room because this baby was coming RIGHT NOW.’
“We got the call. THE CALL. A baby had been born the day prior, and his birth mother had chosen us to raise him. We spent the next 12 hours frantically rushing around. And then, literally on our way out the door, we got another call: she had changed her mind. This wasn’t our baby.”
‘I still love you.’ When he was 13, he told me he was pansexual. I wasn’t sure what steps I should take as his mother, or even what an appropriate response was.’
“I wanted to prove to Adrian that there is support for him beyond what he saw. Most people have heard that a number of transgender people will attempt suicide. Regardless, this is simply not a risk I was willing to take.”
