“I get the ‘ohhhhhhh’ look. Like my marriage is one step away from separate houses and eventually separate lives. ‘But what about cuddling? What about SEX?’ they ask. I feel like this is something I needed to get off my chest.”
‘My husband and I sleep in separate rooms. For 11 years, he’s been downstairs while I’m all the way up in my private mom-cave.’: Woman urges ‘every couple is different, do your thang!’
‘Some curves don’t need to be flattened.’: Woman urges ‘you are not a before, you are not an after, you are a right now’
“Countless nights I prayed. Countless nights I spoke to the air hoping someone was listening, and I would wake up and not be me. I wanted so badly to fit the mold.”
‘I felt it was ‘easier’ to blend in. It sucked all my energy. I became so used to seeking approval, I didn’t realize I was losing myself.’: Woman urges ‘it’s okay to not be everyone’s cup of tea’
“It was my default to smile, nod, and be in agreement. It was my default to shrink myself so others could feel better about themselves. It was my default to dim my light because others felt I was too bright. As I got older, I started to question, ‘Why am I wasting my precious time and energy on people I don’t even vibe with?'”
‘You know we work at the same Kroger, right? I’m a cashier.’ His opening line didn’t impress me. Something told me to respond.’: Woman with hearing loss finds true love who allows her to be herself
“His demeanor was off-putting. I am deaf in my right ear, and wear a hearing aid in my left ear. It was one of the most excruciating first dates I’ve ever had. ‘I’m going back to his place, just so you know.’ I was unsure if he was alluding to something sexual.”
‘I don’t really like black people, but you’re different.’ I shrank inside myself. I couldn’t change my skin, but I could lose every identifiable piece of who I was to blend in.’: Woman recalls experiences with racism, ‘I’m no longer a scared little girl’
“After months of being teased about my accent, my clothes, my hair, my body, I had no wherewithal to speak up when the N-word came out of the mouth of someone I considered a friend. I froze. I spent the rest of the year working hard to drop my accent. I got quiet. I learned not to raise my hand, because the teacher would make it a point to humiliate me anyway.”
‘Hey sister, wear the shorts. You see dimples, cellulite. I see a woman who deserves to feel beautiful in whatever she chooses.’: Woman urges ‘confidence looks beautiful on you’
“Confidence looks beautiful on you, sis. Wear it proudly.”
‘Never apologize for what you want. You have to go for it. You can’t compare your path with the path of others.’: Woman says ‘forge your own way and own it’
“You have the entire world at your finger tips, but that world is whatever you decide to make it. We cannot apologize for the things we want when and if they do not fall in line with the expectations the world has set for us.”
‘You are His masterpiece, beautiful girl. You can’t compete with an edited image of another girl. You’re already valuable.’: Mom says ‘your worth cannot be measured from the outside’
“When I delivered you in the hospital and saw your face for the very the first time, I was instantly in love with all of you. God gave you the exact color of eyes and hair on your head, and gifts and talents for a reason. Your worth and value can’t be measured from the outside.”
‘A friend gifted me ‘booty leggings.’ I was so excited to try them. When they arrived in the mail, they had no tag, no size, no number.’: Woman urges ‘I’m more than a number, and so are you’
“I wondered what size she sent me. When I saw them, I was caught off guard. Just a pair of leggings. No numbers. But maybe a message.”
‘Dear teenage sister, I tried commenting on this photo you posted, but noticed you deleted it 2 minutes later because it didn’t get enough likes.’: Woman pens touching letter to younger sister
“I write this with a lump in my throat, tears in my eyes. I feel sick at the thought kids your age don’t know how amazing you are, how LOVED you are. Not just ‘liked’ on Instagram, but insurmountably loved. Here. In real life. Just as you are. I promise no app, no social media platform, or amount of internet followers will ever scratch the surface of your worth.”
