“Then it was announced the competition involved the husbands picking up their wives. My heart stopped for a moment. There was no way your husband was going to be able to lift you. You tried to leave the stage. Then it was your turn.”
‘Dear fat woman on vacation, you looked gorgeous as you and your husband got on stage for a couples’ contest. I could tell you are outgoing. I was excited to see you kick butt.’
‘My husband told me breast implants would help ‘spice things up’. I was 22 and wanted to feel feminine. I constantly found him viewing pornography, which made me feel undesirable.’
“My joints were swollen and I couldn’t wear my wedding ring anymore. My hair started falling out in chunks that would clog the drain. I figured it was just part of being a new mom and shook it off. No doctor could figure out what was wrong.”
‘You’d be SO MUCH prettier if you lost weight.’ I was 10. My siblings got juice, while I was only offered water. When we got into fights, ‘fatty’ was their low blow.’
“With a disgusted look, my own trainer asked, ‘Why are you SO overweight?’ I felt like I was just punched in my (fat) gut. I cancelled my gym membership and dropped out of high school. Ashamed and embarrassed, I just wanted to crawl in a hole and cry. I always felt in competition with my siblings.”
‘Why are you so hateful to yourself?’ ‘Oh, hell,’ I muttered before folding over in sobs. He wasn’t wrong. I am my own worst bully. The things I say to myself are plain awful.’
“Your daughter walks out the door with her prom date. What is on your mind as the two stroll hand in hand, down the sidewalk to the car? ‘Car crash.’ We respond, almost in unison. ‘Death.’ A little creepy, I admit.”
“He told me to unblock my ex’s number. At 2 a.m., he messaged me. ‘I know I’m not supposed to be talking to you, but I wanted to reach out to see how you were doing.’
“I came home from school. No one was home. I went up to my room, and opened my window. ‘If I jump, who would even miss me?’ All of a sudden, I was overcome with emotions. ‘My beautiful daughter, do not do this.'”
‘STEFANY! Are you out with someone else? Don’t you love me anymore? CALL ME BACK!’ Finally, I went home. ‘We have to break up.’ He starts sobbing. ‘Who is HE?!’ Something in me snapped.’
“He picked me up in his fancy car. Rented us a beach front hotel with a balcony. We had our first kiss. It was perfect. When I got home, one of his friends tried to warn me. Told me to be careful.”
‘I was almost a school shooter. I had 2 locations mapped out. The bullying became unbearable. But 2 things stopped me, and altered the course of my life.’
“Mike took me in that night, letting me sleep in his room against his parents’ wishes, sneaking me leftovers from dinner. He helped me wash my clothes and let me take a shower. I hadn’t shared my feelings with anyone, but someone was watching.”
Boy grows hair to donate to kids in need: ‘What are you doing in the boy’s bathroom? You look like a GIRL!’ One parent asked, ‘Is that a boy? That is such irresponsible parenting!’ His hair was long and angelic. I never understood.’
“No matter what he wore, he was mistaken as a girl by strangers. Even in his Spider Man costume, someone said, ‘Oh she’s so cute!’ I got used to correcting people. One day, I was called into the principal’s office.”
‘My boss said, ‘PLEASE wear makeup like other girls. And do something about your hair.’ It felt intentionally hurtful. ‘Don’t you see it? We’re immigrants. Other staff don’t get treated like we do!’
“I loved my frizzy, wavy mane. I protested and the mind games started. Gossiping to other staff about me. Asking to have me fired daily when I did nothing to deserve being fired. It got personal.”
‘Two blonde girls at the playground told my daughter she couldn’t play with them because she doesn’t have blonde hair. The girls’ parents did not intervene.’
“You better believe I did.”
