“I remember my husband crying. He never cries, so I knew it was serious. I had a new baby and two small children at home. All I could think was, ‘I’m gonna die. I’m not gonna see my kids grow up.’ I’d started bleeding at 6 weeks pregnant. I had 20 ultrasounds and everyone said the baby was fine. But I knew something else was going on.”
‘I hadn’t even held my baby yet when the doctor came in. ‘We’ve found a growth. You need to come back in 2 weeks.’ I lost it! The happiest day of my life quickly turned into the worst.’ Cancerous growth found on woman’s labor day
‘My principal told me, ‘Some kids just like to be bullied.’ She stared squarely at my parents. ‘Unless it involves blood, don’t call me.’ I felt so alone.’
“All of my materials were stolen and vandalized. I would barter with my bullies. ‘If you’ll be nice to me for one lunch hour or recess, I’ll give you my lunch.’ I literally gave them everything I had, but everything wasn’t enough. There wasn’t a single morning I didn’t beg my mother to not make me go.”
‘I was asked if I had any questions. All I could manage to mumble was, ‘Will I lose my hair?’ I was 16. I was in high school. I was a girl. I couldn’t be bald. I just couldn’t.’
“Three words. That’s all it took. Three simple words. Everything was happening too fast. I just sat there, staring at the wall, trying not cry. When homecoming came, I had this beautiful red dress. I put on heels, makeup. Then I looked in the mirror and crumbled to the ground. What was I thinking? I looked ridiculous. I looked sick.”
‘WHAT!? Going from no kids to 2 under 2 in 1 day?! What on earth were we getting ourselves into?! My husband and I looked at each other. ‘WHO THOUGHT THIS WAS A GOOD IDEA?’
“The docs were certain I had mono. I kept thinking to myself, ‘There’s no way this is happening again’. The next day I get an urgent call. The clinic frantically demanded for me to be at the hospital ASAP for an ultrasound. I literally laughed. ‘I’m not pregnant, you must have called the wrong patient.’”
‘Come feel this,’ the doctor said. I put my hand on her belly. My heart sank.’ Mom recalls daughter’s rare cancer diagnosis after thinking it was just an ‘umbilical cord hernia’
“I snapped the traditional well-check picture of my daughter sitting on the exam table, bragging about our healthy girl. We were about to walk out with a good bill of health when the doctor asked me if I had any concerns. That’s when I remembered her large tummy. He laid her down on the exam table, and his face quickly changed to reflect my concern.”
‘We were celebrating 3 years of marriage. I thought life couldn’t get any better. When I laid down, I got news no one wants to hear. I ran to the bathroom and hovered over the toilet, dry heaving.’
“Tears rolled down my face. I went to lie down again and the entire sequence replayed itself. I could hardly believe it. Just like that, we transitioned from ‘recently married’ to ‘patient and caregiver’ and there was no stopping it. We began writing funeral plans.”
‘She could not have been more perfect. When she died unexpectedly 2 months later, I thought my heart stopped with hers.’
“Three months after my love proposed to me, I found a lump. I was told I was ‘lucky’ because I had the ‘good kind’ of cancer. It was a hugely insensitive thing to say. My friends were buying homes, getting promotions, having children – and I’m the ‘lucky’ one?”
‘He had the Stanford medical degree, not me. I trusted him. Aren’t we supposed to believe the doctor? I was home alone when I got the call.’: Woman receives unexpected cancer diagnosis after colon surgery fallout
“I decided that day I was going to take my life. I knew I couldn’t survive chemotherapy and breast cancer alone, and I was too prideful to really ask for help. I decided killing myself would do my family and friends a favor. I was a liability, not an asset. I had gone from being a thriving mother, model and athlete to a sickly woman needing constant care. My life had crumbled.”
‘I wore red lipstick during my mastectomy. The nurses joked I looked ‘too good’ for somebody having surgery. I had a huge party the night before. I bought a wig to look like Britney Spears!’
“We can all become overwhelmed with the negativity in the world. From my experience during cancer I can tell you there is so much good. My support even came from strangers.”
‘I went to my doctor to get an ultrasound of my abdomen. The results sent my world into a spiral. I was in complete shock. Was this the end for me?’
“We all have that inner voice that tells us when something is wrong. Something in your gut. Mine was saying this news wasn’t going to be good. The gynecologist came in, sat next to me on the bed, and said, ‘I’m sorry kiddo.'”
