“I put on my backpack, left school, and walked across the street. I was surprised to be greeted by two smiling men who didn’t offer me a Coke, but real alcohol. I was flattered to be included in such grown-up activity. All three of us got into the car. I was naïve to their motives.”
‘Just be a good boy and relax,’ he said. He was my teacher. Other men watched. Next was a priest and a trio of monks. I was 11 and my parents didn’t know.’
‘My father secretly recorded videos of me naked. I wanted nothing but my mother’s love and support. ‘Get out of my house,’ she told me.’
“I wouldn’t allow him to have power over me any longer. I stood up and walked out of the house. No one followed, no one cared. I had angels flying over me that night.”
‘I asked to borrow his Walkman. He said, ‘Sure, if you let me touch you.’ I could hear him breathing heavy in my ear, and I was frozen. He told me not to tell.’
“All of a sudden, we heard my uncle’s car pull up. He opened the door quickly. There was a smashed lamp on the floor. He looked at me and asked, ‘What is going on?’”
‘Just lay there, be still, your Daddy’s good little girl.’ I stared at the ceiling, remembering his breath on me. Finally, he left the room to start my bath. ‘You wouldn’t want us to go away, would you?’
“There was a window behind the bed. A woman came out of the building. I waved violently. ‘HELP!’ The woman stood there, looked at me, and walked away, going to her car to leave. My safety, my possibility of help, was gone.”
