“The comb would make a dry, raking noise. Clumps of hair were ripped off my scalp. I tried not to react. If I winced of moved, Mother would just do it harder. She was careful to only do it behind closed doors.”
‘My mother aggressively combed my curls with a plastic fine-toothed comb. It was painful. If I protested or uttered a sound, Mother would punch me on the head and rake the comb harder.’
‘Good job Mommy. You came just in time.’ I asked her why. She replied, ‘I didn’t want Addison to feel bad that I have two daddies, and she only has one.’
“‘Why would she feel bad?,’ I asked. It was in that moment, I knew I would never have to worry about Emma missing a piece of her heart. It never left her. Unlike her younger siblings, she has two daddies that love her. Her daddy here at home, and her daddy in heaven.”
‘My mommy and daddy sleeped in different beds last night!’ That’s how my 3-year-old chose to greet our babysitter as she walked in the door.’
“’This is how rumors get started,’ I told myself. All of a sudden it becomes, ‘I always knew there was something off about him…’ ‘I knew their marriage was too good to be true…’”
‘My husband and I decided during his deployment we would try to get pregnant as soon as he got home. I got pregnant the first try. But, I wasn’t supposed to mother this baby.’
“It was hell. My doctor removed it and sent me on my way. And then I was alone.”
‘Baby, when I hear you say you’re pregnant what I actually hear is ‘life destroyed.’ He was right. The Universe had been playing this cruel joke on me for 4 years.’
“Surprisingly, the doctor pulled me into her arms, ignoring professionalism and boundaries, and held me. She whispered in my ear, ‘I heard you talking in the change room. I know how badly you wanted this. Don’t give up yet.’”
‘A stranger put hands on my child. When my 2-year-old son pushed hers, I immediately said I was sorry. She ignored my apology. It’s wrong, and it’s not okay.’
“I went home and cried. His high-five was left unmet as the other mother shooed him away and said to her toddler, ‘You don’t have to touch him, honey.’ There’s no way that woman could’ve known, but the day before she swatted at my son, he was diagnosed with autism.”
‘Girl, I bet you’ll get pregnant right after you adopt. Just watch!’ It’s nails on a chalkboard when I hear that.’
“We didn’t adopt in order to become pregnant. I never want my sweet girl to think she was SECOND best. You are the absolute BEST thing that ever happened to me.”
‘When I placed my order I said, ‘Regular amount of chromosomes, please!’ That’s what everyone else got and what I wanted too.’
“They called me and said, ‘Great news, we went ahead and upgraded you to extra chromosomes for free! You’ll receive the extra chromosomes with your completed order in 9 months.’ What?! I was mad!”
‘Some children are just born feral. If a know-it-all wants to tell you otherwise, go find them a drunk and hungry hyena. Shove it into some Doc McStuffins pull-ups and drop it off at their house.’
“Tell them it likes to eat broccoli and really needs a bath. Then go back in 24 hours and see how confident Mr. Know It All still feels about parenting your feral born child.”
‘When I was pregnant, I thought about that perfect ‘going home’ outfit for my child. A soft, blue sleeper with tiny elephants dancing across. But, I never had that picture-perfect moment.’
“I stood outside the children’s store, my hands shaking as my heart started racing. I took a deep breath, wiped away my tears, and put on a brave face as I walked inside. I handed the outfit to my mother and told her I had to leave, the heartache proved too much.”
