“Everyone asked if we were doing anything special in honor of Alex on the first anniversary of his death. I refuse, to this day, to call it an anniversary. It is the day our lives changed forever. Anniversaries are for celebrating. So I just call it the day Alex died.”
‘The ache in my heart starts around the holidays. I know I am being ‘watched.’ I’m actually afraid everyone will think I have moved on and forgotten my son.’
‘Don’t let him move back in, he’s going to kill you.’ I’d been living through hell in a horrible marriage. Most said, ‘Wow we thought you were so happy.’ I didn’t want anyone to know.’
“This little girl is excited and doesn’t understand why so many people have stopped by. Why are people bringing us food? Not realizing that her world is about to change. Her mom had been holding a secret.”
‘Santa walks over to a veteran sitting on the wall. As Santa approaches, the veteran stands, and Santa takes a knee.’
“I hear Santa telling the gentleman, in a soft voice, of others he knew who served. He shakes his hand with genuine gratefulness, thanking him for his service, then returns to the children.”
‘When Santa was pouring milk into my son’s tube, he beamed with pride. ‘You see him give me my milkies mommy?!’
“Poor Santa was so nervous he was shaking. I was crying seeing how happy Austin was, feeling included sharing cookies with Santa!”
‘You know what I don’t remember about my childhood Christmases? I don’t remember anything being especially decorated.’
“I don’t remember Pottery Barn centerpieces or monogrammed stockings. I don’t remember Pinterest-worthy trees or anything that would make one declare, ‘That is so precious. I must Instagram it immediately.’ That all might have been there. But if it was, I don’t remember.”
‘I’ve actually heard my Grandkids calculating which Grandparent they can hit up for which toys for maximum impact. Our little angels are fully aware of our weakness.’
“When my girls were little, my parents doted on them shamelessly. Over-the-top-please-stop-you’re-ruining-my-kids doting. It made me nuts, but now I get it.”
‘I like daddy better than you! He always plays with me!’ Soul crushing, right? All the things I do for you go unnoticed, but I’ll do them for you anyway.’
“I’m the one tidying up the toys while you are wrestled with. I make sure all your appointments are up to date, even when I forget my own. I’m the one up till 3 a.m. making the LEGO house you asked for. Hiding Christmas presents.”
‘My sons wear shorts in winter, swearing they ‘aren’t even cold, MOM!’ Weird, I know, because they need approximately 13 blankets to fall asleep.’
“My boys were born with a rare yet serious condition known as never-cold-rothopy. Symptoms include having no capacity for feeling cold, having a strong aversion to wearing pants, and becoming highly offended and irrationally emotional when someone suggests they should.”
‘Hi, nice flight attendant. Yes, there’s 7 of us. We’re in row 37. Keep walking kiddos, keep going. Nope, keep going. Yes, hi strangers. Yup, they’re all ours.’
“That guy staring at us does not look kid-friendly at all. That man looks very business professional. I hope he’s not the one sitting in front of us as my kids kick his seat on accident for the 14th time.”
‘I whispered to Santa, ‘He is blind and autistic and is very interested in Santa.’ He said, ‘Say no more,’ and immediately got down on the floor to greet my little man.’
“He asked Matthew if he wanted to feel anything and Matthew said, ‘Your eyes that twinkle.’ My heart was so full.”
