“My daughter is a waitress at a local diner. She is also 7 months pregnant and working still to save as much money as she can. This will be her first child and she is so excited. She has a lot of regulars, but this was not one of them.”
‘Enjoy your first, You will never forget it.’ The officer paid his bill, and left a note for my daughter. I don’t know you Mr. Police Officer, but you made my little girl cry.’
‘We got THE CALL. ‘Would you be willing to accept a 3-month-old baby with serious medical needs?’ Our girl had endured more in those first 3 months than most do in a lifetime.’
“The thought of leaving her at school left me breathless. Would her teacher know what she needed? What if she was sad? Would she be scared? Made fun of by other kids for the ‘funny way’ she spoke? While our love and commitment to her never wavered for a second, it was earth shattering to hear.”
‘Mothers don’t shower often. Especially new mothers. When we say this stuff, we are met with horror. But it is the truth.’
“I remember finally getting the energy to shower, a place where I’d feel so tired that I’d read the shower bottles and stare into space while the water hit my back. I was a zombie. My husband came in and said, ‘It’s time to feed him,’ and I cried.”
‘Chemo would make my breast milk toxic to my son. Cancer had already robbed me of the pure joy of a new baby. I was not about to sit back and let it take away breastfeeding my son.’
“Here we were newlyweds of just 4 months, with 4 children together, one of whom was just a week old. The only option I had was to find a family member or friend who would be willing to latch Malcolm to their breast once a week so he would remember how to do it if and when the time came for me to try.”
‘I love you, Cindy, I’ll always love you. Please forgive me.’ I was no longer going to be her Momma and watch her grow up. ‘DO IT NOW,’ the Voice says.’
“This time it will work. I even have two bottles of sleeping pills for safety’s sake. Time to die. I unscrew both lids and turn the tap on. I’ve locked the door behind me, just in case, but I’m not expecting anyone else … not in this lifetime.”
‘I hit bottom. Knees to the ground, ugly tears in the shower. My friends stepped in. They didn’t ask what I needed because honestly, I’m in so deep I have no idea what I need.’
“We have three new foster children and the trenches of trauma and grief are deep. My village stepped into the trenches and sat with me. They didn’t ask me what I needed, they just started providing.”
‘The minute we walked inside, the room became silent. Every child stared or pointed at my son. I know he looks different, but today hurt.’
“I was about to address the entire class about differences; but then I stopped. I looked to the back of the room where my son fled to hide. He had buried his head in his arms because you cannot hide in plain sight. I touched his shoulder, knelt down and asked, ‘Do you want to leave?’ ‘Yes,’ he whispered.”
‘I met an older couple before our flight. They had the unfortunate chance of sitting next to us. Sofia is truly the devil’s child, and acted accordingly.’
“My children had never flown before. Sofia hates loud noises and is spooked easily. I was really worried.”
‘While waiting to board our plane, my daughter was being her inquisitive self, meeting and saying ‘Hi’ to everyone she could, until she walked up on this man.’
“This wasn’t a short, little exchange.”
‘I saw you hand over your note with sadness in your eyes. You looked at the pharmacist with fear as she read your details. You replied with the most defeated ‘no’ I’d ever heard.’
“I saw your knuckles turn white on that stroller handle bar. I saw you look down on your baby while it was starting to stir. ‘Please don’t cry,’ you whispered.”
