Crohn’s disease

‘I love you. It’s not your fault,’ my mom said, crying. I screamed, trying to keep her awake until paramedics reached her.’: Daughter says losing mother to suicide was ‘the most painful experience I’ve ever gone through’

“A friend of my mom said, ‘Look, your mom came to make December beautiful again.’ It’s so true. My daughter is the light of my life. It’s emotional raising a daughter without my own mother alive, but I understand now I would not have the beautiful life I have today if she hadn’t passed.”

‘What now?,’ is all that ran through my mind. ‘How did this happen to me?’ All the voices in the room disappeared. I was washed on a metal table with hoses that hung from the ceiling.’

“He instilled in my mind there was better out there. Someone who he didn’t have to help when I wasn’t feeling well, someone who he didn’t have to go to the ER with, someone who was ‘normal,’ who’s body was not scarred up. I said to my dad, ‘I can’t do it anymore. I can’t take this anymore.'”

‘At 12 years old, symptoms began to manifest. I had joint pain in my knees and mouth sores on my gums. Food gave me belly aches. Aside from winter colds, I never was sick.’

“My parents were concerned. I had lost weight and they could see changes in me. I was 13 now, in the hospital to stabilize my 80-pound body. My parents were frustrated I followed ‘the rules.’ ‘If I thought the day of my diagnosis was life-shattering, this day would change the whole trajectory of how I lived my life.”

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