“Family life will nickel and dime you. It’ll squeeze you until you’ve got nothing left. Then it’ll squeeze you even harder. And right when you think you’re completely tapped out and you don’t have what it takes… You walk in on a moment like this.”
‘You spent 30 years chasing something, only to get ahold of it and realize your dream is completely, utterly exhausting.’: Mom says family life isn’t for the ‘faint of heart,’ but tender moments make it all worth it
‘My dad hates me,’ the girl whispered in my ear with a sullen look on her face. It was one of the first hugs I gave.’
“An hour later, a girl pointed to my shirt. ‘Hey, free dad hugs!’ The look on her face said everything I needed to know. She hugged me as if she hadn’t seen me in years. She walked away in tears, without ever saying a word. I’m nobody special. I’m just a regular dad.”
‘We were turned down by 35 surrogates because of our sexual orientation. We just wanted a baby to love and hold. We knew our journey wasn’t going to be easy.’
“When we finally found a surrogate, she was experiencing problems. We started to feel cursed. But right around 3am, we got the call of our lives.”
‘I saw his tiny little head emerge. ‘Shirts off!!’ Baby was placed on Frank’s chest. I wrapped my arms around my husband and our son. She made our dreams come true.’
“We were instantly overwhelmed with love that we began crying! She gave us a family. It was the most powerful moments of our lives. There were a lot of revelations from this photo. ‘I didn’t like gay people before I saw your photo, and my mind is changed.’”
‘Can you come to the hospital right now to meet your daughter?’ It was relatively late on a Friday night, but we immediately recognized the number. We fought hard for Grace.’
“Less than 45 minutes after that call, directly from the hospital, she came home for the first time. It felt a bit chaotic and strange at the same time.”
‘We were court ordered to conduct drop offs and pick-ups at the police station. We were a mess. A disgrace. I knew this wasn’t healthy for our children.’
“Divorce. There we were, in and out of court, screaming in the street during drop-off like a Jerry Springer episode. At some point we realized it’s easier to put our differences aside and to co-parent these kids together. Do it for the kids.”
‘If we don’t get approved, it’s my fault.’ His older brother and dad disowned him when he came out. He hasn’t spoken to his birth mom for 8 years.’
“She advised ‘Pudding’ would be be better suited with two men as he wasn’t a fan of women.”
‘You wonder, ‘Do they even know my name?’ All the nurses direct their attention to mom. Not one person notices your eyes swell with tears. You, too, are broken. I see you.’
“Your child enters this world silent and fragile. You allow your child’s mom to hold your precious little one first, but your hands shake with anticipation to hold the child you both created. You stand tall next to the woman you love, while inside, you are broken.”
‘Two women wanted to help us create the family we had always wanted. The funny thing is – we never asked them. They asked US.’
“My first comment was, ‘We need to hire some staff!!!’ I actually almost fainted. The nurse had to bring me a glass of water before we could even attend to Danielle, who now realized she was carrying twins!”
‘I received suspicious looks for being a grown man at the park at 2 p.m. with his kids. ‘It’s nice of you to do your wife’s job,’ is what they were really saying.’
“I ran into friends at the grocery store, and they asked me if I’d lost my job. All of it was maddening.”
