“I feel bad about it to this day. What we brushed off as her ditsy-ness was actually the first signs of the disease. I hate myself for the way I acted that day. I feel so bad and so guilty. It kills me.”
‘My mom went all out. I remember thinking how random it seemed. She tried so hard, wanting to make this nice dinner for us. We made fun of her for it.’
‘As soon as she checked with the doppler she knew. And deep down I knew. I just prayed I was wrong. All I could get out is ‘why isn’t it flickering?’ They just said ‘we are trying to figure that out.’
“I screamed, asking if it was her cord that caused it over and over.”
‘He carried her! I noticed an elderly lady having a rough time. I pointed her out to my husband. She did not have the strength to come up the stairs.’
“Y’all I have to brag on my husband big time! He made me soo proud.”
‘I met him on a dating site. I was scared because you hear horror stories about creeps. Out of all the guys, Jimmy was the ONLY one who didn’t ask me. He changed my life completely.’
“28 years ago I was born with a spinal cord injury due to my doctor using forceps, and came out basically dead. Doctors told my parents I would be like a vegetable. But they were wrong. Then, I met Jimmy.”
‘Only a motherless daughter knows the deafening silence in a delivery room when her mother isn’t there for her grandchild’s first breath.’
“Only a motherless daughter knows the power behind that last ‘I love you.’ Only a motherless daughter knows the difference between ‘I miss my Mom’ because she doesn’t live here, and ‘I miss my Mom’ because she lives in Heaven.”
‘My daughter was fed a cashew. She had itchy ears within 5 minutes, but was still playing. It all changed moments later. They laid her down quickly, and she started blacking out.’
“It snuck up on us so unexpectedly and quietly. I expected to see choking, gasping, hear wheezing, see her grabbing at her chest and neck area. It was actually very silent.”
‘You wonder, ‘Do they even know my name?’ All the nurses direct their attention to mom. Not one person notices your eyes swell with tears. You, too, are broken. I see you.’
“Your child enters this world silent and fragile. You allow your child’s mom to hold your precious little one first, but your hands shake with anticipation to hold the child you both created. You stand tall next to the woman you love, while inside, you are broken.”
‘Girl, I bet you’ll get pregnant right after you adopt. Just watch!’ It’s nails on a chalkboard when I hear that.’
“We didn’t adopt in order to become pregnant. I never want my sweet girl to think she was SECOND best. You are the absolute BEST thing that ever happened to me.”
‘I remember screaming into the phone, ‘I need help!’ Please get me help! I don’t know what’s wrong with her.’ Minutes go by and he hasn’t called. I’m starting to really panic.’
“I remember everything getting quiet and realizing my daughter wasn’t crying or screaming any longer. The only sound was me crying. At this point, she is in my arms, up on my shoulder, but her face is nuzzled in my chest and I can’t see her.”
‘My daughter, who is always listening, said, ‘I bet she will say, ‘OH, NO! It’s fine!’ But deep down, she will be angry at you.’ That is what my 9-year-old daughter has already learned. From me.’
“I lie awake after parties and wonder if my joke was taken the wrong way. Whose feelings did I hurt? I apologized to my daughter for my actions that lead her to think women had to hide. That pleasing people should be a top priority. The truth is enough.”
