“When the door closed, I lost it. I glanced over at my husband. His eyes were red as he held my son tighter. It was that traumatic shaking where you can’t stop, no matter how many blankets you cover yourself with.”
‘She let out a deep, gut-wrenching wail. ‘I want my baby sister back!’ She cried. In that moment, they saw mama fall apart for the first time.’
‘Unfortunately I see something here that could be a problem. I saw my mother-in-law’s face. She knew. We both knew something was off. I wanted to disappear.’
“I kept saying to myself nothing was wrong. I had seen the baby move and he looked perfectly beautiful and strong. When the doctor came in, I saw her face. With a serious look she asked me if I was alone.”
‘How could this be happening again? My body did not want to let go of my baby, and neither did I. Nothing prepares you for delivering your dead child.’
“The very cord that was meant to sustain her ended her life so abruptly.”
‘I anxiously laid there, holding my husband’s hand with a big smile on our faces. Only this time, something was different. I frantically scanned the screen. I knew it.’
“I put on the ugly gown, the ugly socks and continue breathing techniques. My husband kisses my hand, kisses my forehead, and holds my hand the entire way. The mask goes on, and I slowly close my eyes.”
‘The doctor came in and said, ‘I’m sorry.’ My husband and I were too in shock to say, ‘Why didn’t you call us?!’’
“I kept thinking to myself, ‘Is my child alive? Why can’t someone just tell me what’s going on?’”
‘I am 31 years old and I am getting a hysterectomy. I waited 10 YEARS before I did anything. I finally had enough.’
“All the doctors told me I was too young to make any rash decisions.”
‘It’s extremely emotional to see my twin son with his brother’s ashes. But I’m so grateful to have such a powerful photo of my boys together forever.’
“She stopped scanning and said to us, ‘I’m so sorry.’ Three words that completely broke my heart and changed my life forever.”
‘I’m so sorry, it looks like her heart stopped beating close to a week ago’
“I felt paralyzed. ‘What does that even MEAN?!’ She’s right there in front of me!! She’s inside of me! How DARE you tell me that! She’s RIGHT THERE! I SEE her!!'”
