“He let me sleep in. Imagine my shock waking up at 10 a.m. to not a sound in the world. Not the pitter patter of little feet, not the tugging of my sheets followed by, ‘mom, mom, mom,’ not the sounds of cartoons. I yawned, threw my hair into a messy bun and made my way downstairs thinking I would find an empty house or sleeping angel children. I didn’t find that.”
‘My husband bungee corded my kid to the backseat. Not kidding. She was 3 years old. I honestly didn’t believe it. But there she was, strapped in a makeshift five-point harness.’
‘She sat next to her dying father, her best friend, and grabbed his hand. She whispered in his ear it was ‘ok to go.’ She would be alright. He could stop being in pain.’
“With her hair in a ponytail and her face stained with tears, she pet his hair while he gasped for air. She put a cross in his hand when she knew he was never coming back. She kissed him on the cheek and uttered ‘goodbye.’ She sat with him for an hour after he stopped breathing, making sure he was not alone.”
‘I crashed the party my 16 year-old-daughter was at. I rolled up on it to hear, ‘drink, drink, drink.’ I had visions of my sweet girl suspended in the air, held up by football players as she gulped cheap beer.’
“I raced to the front porch, paralyzed. Do I swing open the door and just run in? Do I call the cops? As I stood with my hand up in the knocking position, the door opened.”
‘Do I need to separate you two?,’ the flight attendant asked. Wait. WHAT? I looked up from my magazine, confused. My kid sniffled. ‘Nothing gets better at 30,000 feet,’ she continued.’
“My first thought was, ‘Does your ATTITUDE, Janet?’ This was all because my 16-year-old daughter had to leave her boyfriend behind to see her sister graduate from COLLEGE. I thought she would ballet leap onto the plane. I was wrong, friends. I was so wrong.”
‘Passenger 2C stomped onto the plane. He should have worn a sign that read, ‘Do you know who I am?’ Did you really have to throw your foot on the armchair? Darn. So sorry.’
“I have finally figured out why I was so mad at him, and why my heart was so full of hate. Passenger 2C, I’m sorry I said mean things. If I hadn’t been making fun of you, I would have doubled over in my seat sobbing.”
‘Hi, how are you?’ ‘Any weird fetishes?’ ‘Have all your teeth?’ Dating in your 40s is dumb. Widowhood is dumb. Spanx? Yeah, no. But I don’t want to be alone forever, so it’s a necessary evil.’
“When I was in my 20’s, dating was easy. I threw on something cute in a size 3 and went to parties. Sometimes I went to the wrong house, but you’d be surprised how nice people are when you show up with a 6-pack. Well, it’s not that easy anymore.”
‘My son was screaming, ‘That thing on her chest popped!’ The doctor bandaged it up and told me to change it once a day. Um, yeah. Ok. Have you ever tried taking a bandage off a 4-year-old? Like giving a cat a bath.’
“My son came in. He knew he had to act. He took a bandage from the counter and presented his little sister with a simple question. ‘If I put this bandage on me, and let you take it off, will you let Mom take off yours?’ She pondered the idea, then nodded in agreement. He was going to protect her forever.”
‘I looked to the corner of my room and saw him sitting there. ‘No,’ I thought to myself. ‘No, I will not do this.’ I looked back to the bed. Still empty. And then it happened. I fell to my knees.’
“I let the nightmare play out. I screamed. I cried harder than I ever have. And as suddenly as it came, it was gone. The room was still. It was quiet. I looked back to the corner. But he was still there. He was still sitting there, watching.”
‘My friend called and said I had to fertilize my lawn. ‘What?,’ I asked. ‘You know, fertilizer.’ Visions of spreading cow crap bare-handed dance in my head. ‘It’s going to rain tomorrow, so do it today.’
“I said, ‘fine,’ all the while thinking, “this is dumb, this is dumb, this is dumb.’ Yet I realize this is one of those things I have to do now, on my own. So, I sent my daughter to the store to grab a bag, and $25.00 later, I’m ready to go. Or so I thought…”
‘The last stop was the frozen aisle. That’s when I saw her. I wanted to help. Would she think I was a kidnapper? Her son turned the corner and disappeared. I knew I had to act.’
“Two years later, it happened again. I was at a cancer specialty hospital with my now late husband, who had been diagnosed. I was scared. As we were walking out to the car, I saw her again. She was crying.”
