eating disorder awareness

‘I’m on the floor, asking a friend to break isolation, putting her kids in danger, to come get the lentils from my fridge.’: Woman suffers from ARFID eating disorder

“It means you are happy to eat as many chicken nuggets as your belly can contain, but they must be from Wendy’s, they must be room temperature, and they must be dipped in a 50/50 mixture of ketchup and bbq sauce. If anything in that ritual is changed, then you cannot eat a single bite. Not will not, can not. You would literally rather starve to death then let that food pass over your lips.”

‘He said I was a hypochondriac and was faking. ’You must be enjoying the attention.’ I became extremely nauseous, dizzy, shaky, and felt like I was going to pass out.’: Woman with bulimia, POTS, MCAS, EDS struggles for symptoms to be believed

“I don’t remember losing consciousness. Everything happened so fast, the next thing I can clearly remember is lying flat. I was sitting there, in a wheelchair, and he said I was a hypochondriac and was faking. I left his office in tears.”

‘At 12, the psychiatrist gave an ultimatum. ‘If you don’t gain 0.2 pounds by Monday, I’m sticking a tube down your throat and admitting you to the psych ward.’: Anorexia survivor says ‘recovery is a choice I make every day’

“I cheated my way out, really believing the worst was over. That lasted 12 hours. My mom took me to the supermarket to buy a birthday cake for my friend. I stood in the cake aisle and started to panic. I couldn’t do it. I was so consumed by it, even looking at the cake felt like something I’d have to punish myself for. I left the story empty-handed and in tears. I didn’t think I’d live to see my 15th birthday.”

‘Why would you do this to yourself? This is just bizarre.’ It’s hard to look in the mirror and see the damage I’ve done.’: Woman shares her history of self-mutilation and bulimia

“Sometimes I’d hit a vein and the blood would shoot out in an arc, creating stripes across the mirror and pouring into the sink. I was cutting away everything seemingly imperfect. Pulling out little threads which turned out to be nerves, partially paralyzing my lower lip and bits of my chin. I still didn’t stop.”

‘When my dad whispered, ‘I love you,’ I knew it was more than that. It was a final goodbye. They were ready to let go.’: Woman diagnosed with eating disorder at 13 finally accepts help, ‘I am ready to start the next, better, decade of my life’

“My parents had shed too many tears over me, and I couldn’t bear it to break their hearts again. I felt ready to die, but knew it wasn’t my time. I was weak. I gave up the reigns and opted for inpatient treatment. I was frustrated, and I let this be known. I would shout and hit the walls. I would argue. But gradually, I came to life again. I am no longer held back by my demons.”

‘My mom said, ‘You have to leave. I’ll kill myself if you stay in this house with us.’ I was given one week.’: Woman overcomes neglect, eating disorder, ‘I wake up every day and choose recovery’

“When I had my first period, I felt I was confessing to a huge crime. I asked her, ‘Why?’ She simply said, ‘Out of sight, out of mind.’ I moved into a rundown bed where nobody spoke English. There was no lock on the front door and I frequently saw and heard people doing drugs on the roof of my bedroom.”

‘My mom would say I was ‘ballooning.’ I was in 4th grade. She’d implement some new weird food rule for my ‘health.’: Woman is ‘blown away’ by body positive community, ‘I learned to love myself, heal my relationship with my body and soul’

“Maybe my mom thought I wasn’t smart enough to hear what she was really saying: ‘My daughter is broken, how do I fix her?’ I was working out. I was doing everything right, wasn’t I? ‘Why am I still fat?,’ I asked myself. I was 10. Eating 500 calories a day, no cheating. But it was there, in that despair, that my life started to change. I came across a plus-size woman’s account and was… blown away.”

‘I wouldn’t use Chapstick. I was afraid I might lick my lips and accidentally swallow some of it, convinced it would make me fat.’: Woman suffering eating disorder is admitted to recovery center, ‘We aren’t treated like people. We were treated like patients’

“All doors were alarmed, and I was surrounded by strangers. My identical twin made me a blanket to take to treatment. She wanted me to feel at home. The staff wouldn’t allow me to have it. Since I was still on Red level, I wasn’t allowed into my bedroom. I sat on the floor in the hallway by my room and cried to my mom on the phone, begging her to bring me home. As I cried on the floor, a patient walked up to me and handed me a little slip of paper. He had written ‘You can do this’ on a scrap of paper. I sobbed. I still have his note.”

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