“When I went to unstrap him and pick him up, he had a concerned look on his face. He crossed his arms and stared back at me. Call? Check. Clothes? Check. Teeth? Check. ‘What? What is it?,’ I asked. It was too late now. There was no turning back.”
‘I pulled into his school parking lot. ‘Mama, aren’t you FORGETTING something?’ There was terror in his voice. That’s when I noticed it. I’ve never face-palmed so hard in my life.’
‘He rubbed my wedding ring. ‘I don’t love you anymore. I don’t think I want to be married to you.’ It was like a sledgehammer in the chest. All I remember saying is, ‘You don’t mean that.’
“I requested a detailed cellphone bill. That’s when our story changed. My stomach dropped as I saw the SAME phone number on page after page. He was Snapchatting with a single woman. Minutes later, he showed up at our house.”
‘I was okay with him having a daughter, but NOT an ex. ‘I wonder where she’s sitting? Are they on the same couch? Why hasn’t he texted me? They’re back together, in Vegas getting married.’
“If there was a woman coming into MY daughter’s life, I would need their social security number and 20 references. When I met her, she said ‘hi,’ and walked away. Hi. Hi? That’s it? Where’s the interrogation? Where’s the drug test? I told Sam, ‘She hates me! I should text her.’ I was a total crazy person.”
‘I cried when I told you. I knew it was my fault. You looked at me like you wanted to say you loved me, one last time. A ping hit my chest. I was careful with you.’
“I trusted you. I did everything right. I’m finally letting go. When you find that girl you’re in love with, tell her she’s the luckiest girl in the world. Please take better care of her than you did me.”
‘We found out we were pregnant at 17. We were scared. Soon after, we were having a second. I am so grateful for my ex. I never thought I would say those words. But here I am. So grateful for my ex.’
“We had the ‘million dollar’ family. A boy, a girl, and two high school sweethearts who got married and made it through teen pregnancy. But then, we started to lose the ‘spark.'”
‘Yes, I am a single, widow in her 40s. I know that can be tough to deal with. But frankly, I am tired of hearing, ‘I don’t think I can ever live up to him.’
“There’s something about ‘dating a widow’ that is so hard, and so intimidating for men. They struggle with the idea that a woman can develop feelings for somebody while still loving a man who has passed away.”
‘There is always one day that is simply emotionally confusing: The Ex-Anniversary Date.’
“The first time my ex-anniversary rolled around the calendar I tried to block it out. That lasted about 10 minutes. Suddenly, thoughts and feelings about my divorce started to bubble up. I didn’t know how to feel. I couldn’t keep ignoring my past.”
