foster care

‘I vividly remember. My right arm held the new baby I birthed less than 24-hours ago. My left held my foster son, patting his new sister on the foot. I felt so much joy and so much pain.’

“We sat in the courtroom and listened to the story of lives that had been destroyed. We watched as the judge decided our son could no longer live with his biological parents. I’d be lying if I said a part of me wasn’t relieved. I struggled with feeling I wasn’t enough for these two babies 15 months apart. I believed the lie.”

‘Momma, can you please call the judge? He’s moving too slow. Does he know I need you to be my momma? I’ll tell him. I need to be adopted. I can’t wait anymore.’ My boys waited 3 long years.’

“We started making visits with his siblings. This one forever changed my life. I felt a little tug on my shirt. He said, ‘Are you Jeremy’s mom?’ I said, ‘Yeah buddy, I am.’ And then his crushing response was, ‘Will you be my mom too?’ I cried. I hugged him. I was speechless.”

‘Our daughter has been placed in protective custody,’ my husband said. ‘We will deal with that later,’ I remember replying. Because first, I needed to get high.’

“During a routine traffic stop, my 3-year-old daughter sat unknowingly in the back – so innocent. She cried as I was taken away in handcuffs. I find out I’m pregnant. I’m deep into my addiction – 95 pounds and shooting heroin multiples times a day. I tell my OBGYN. This was a rock bottom plea for help.”

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