“A few days later we pulled into the foster home and met our son for the first time. There are no words that can truly explain that experience, but I can say it is possible to love someone you just met.”
‘We thought we were too young! A proposal? She proceeded to tell us about a little baby boy, only 2 months old, who was ready to come home in three weeks. THREE WEEKS!’
‘We weren’t taking ANY more chances getting pregnant, so my husband got snipped. Then I got a text. ‘I FOUND YOUR BABY!’ I about died.’
“He had a rare disorder and a long list of conditions we didn’t think we were equipped to handle, especially already having a medically-needy child. Not to mention having 3 kids 5 and under! We were a NO, but something stirred in me.”
‘When I was a tiny 5-week-old baby my biological dad became angry at me for crying. He shook me violently and threw me against a wall.’
“I lived with a new family, but things weren’t so good there either. I wasn’t gaining weight and my day care was very concerned about me – a lot of people were, I guess. When DHS finally came to take me to another home, I was found on the floor laying in animal waste.”
‘Hey, Grace. A baby girl was abandoned at the hospital. She doesn’t even have a name. Can you come pick her up in an hour?’
“I open the fridge, over and over, to prove to children there is always food. I attend IEP meetings and I advocate for kids. But you know what else I do?”
‘In these 45 days, I have held my 2-year old while she was throwing up, during blood draws and X-rays. I have watched her learn to trust. I know what blanket she needs to fall asleep.’
“I have met my child’s birth mom and held her. I have cried with her and prayed for her. My heart is wide open. It has grown to love not only this child, but also her biological mother. I’m rooting for her and wanting desperately to help her break this cycle of life she is trapped in.”
‘Strong people do foster care. Bible thumpers do foster care. Not us. People like us do not do foster care.’
“We tried for five long years to have children of our own. Five years is sixty months. That’s six hundred ovulation tests and one hundred and twenty pregnancy tests. Always negative.”
‘I wasn’t sure what type of home he would end up in. Would they let us see him? He was the full-blooded brother to my adopted children. I needed to know he would be okay.’
“When our little girl was 3 months old, bio mom found out she was pregnant again. She decided it was best to surrender her. When baby #2 was born, DCS ended up removing the baby from her care. Bio mom called me in tears, begging me to take her daughter.”
‘I texted my husband I had worried for nothing because everything seemed fine. Until it wasn’t fine. He waited until we were driving home, until he didn’t have to look us in the eye.’
“‘Jen, I heard you’re off work right now.’ BECAUSE I JUST HAD CANCER SURGERY! ‘And you might have some time on your hands.’ BECAUSE HE LOST HIS JOB! ‘And maybe you need a distraction.’ BECAUSE EVERYONE IS DYING! ‘I have two babies in my office. They need a home. Today.’ Ohhhhhhh.”
‘If she says mama, I won’t be able to go through with it.’ She never told him she was pregnant with me. To this day, he has absolutely no idea I exist.’
“I never would have imagined the child we adopted would have a story so shockingly similar to my own. I never imagined it would be my own cousin. I never imagined it would be my biological mother who would play such a pivotal role in all of it.”
‘The morning of her adoption, as the sun crept into our room, I watched her sleep. I studied the curve of her lips, the fullness of her perfect cheeks. This is the moment everything changes.’
“The judge pulled me aside to thank me, one less little person in the system. There is a refreshing light-hearted joy in the courthouse. A day where balloons bounce and smiles are had. For a moment, the cycle of dysfunction is broken.”
