“I knew from the moment I saw this tiny dynamic duo, they were mine – the love at first sight squeezed my heart as I looked into their squishy, brown faces. I was immediately a goner for these kids. We were a force to be reckoned with. I was a mom on a mission, and I was prepared to do anything to seal the deal for our family. Then yet another bomb detonated. My husband Peter fell ill with a vicious terminal disease.”
‘The adoption date changed. Then the unthinkable happened. My darling husband collapsed from a seizure.’: Husband dies 2 weeks before twin adoption finalized to become ‘official family of 5’
‘Divorce isn’t an option. 19-year-old bride, you begin slowly dying. You feel so trapped.’: Young woman feels ‘shame’ for wanting to end ‘picture perfect’ marriage, but had to ‘save’ herself
“‘I met the man I’m going to marry,’ you told your friends. You’re 19 when you first lay eyes on him. From the moment you learn he’s going to be a pastor, you know this is the life for you. Neither of you knew what you were signing up for. You thought if you found a Christian man, one willing to wait to have sex until marriage, life will be perfect. Now, you flinch when touched.”
‘When they flinch from the stapler dropping, it’s because they weren’t sure if you’re throwing it at them.’: Foster mom pens powerful note to teacher warning of her children’s trauma
“They come from a really, really hard place. The kind of abuse you think can’t be real. They duck for cover. You’ve heard of fight or flight? There is also freeze. One of my kids responds with ‘freeze.’ Her eyes grow wide and her voice silences. It’s how she’s trained herself to survive. My kids need to know you are safe.”
‘You don’t belong here and your color is awful!,’ a child said to my 5-year-old African American son on his first day of school.’: Mom worries for her adopted children at school this year, says despite ‘all the goodness, there is hurt’
“Before he even stepped foot into his new classroom, a child on the playground came up to him. At age 5, my son had to come home and tell our family this as we sat around the dinner table. I had to look away so he wouldn’t see my tears.”
‘I can’t introduce you to my kids until I know. They’ll attach to you, and I can’t break their hearts.’: Girlfriend nervous it’s ‘too soon’ to meet boyfriend’s kids, feels anxious to not ‘replace’ mom
“While I waited, my mind raced. Did their mom know I was spending the weekend with them? Do I hug them? I was suddenly anxious. I heard the door open. ‘Natalie,’ Kevin called, ‘Come up here.’ I breathed in deeply and felt jitters. I wanted these boys to not feel awkward. I knew I wasn’t their mom, and I would never think I’m replacing her.”
‘So, do you just not want kids?’ I’d lie, tell them we weren’t ready. No one wants to hear their nurse say, ‘We can’t have babies.’: Woman embarks on foster care journey, turns ‘party of 3’ to a ‘party of 6’
“When others see us, they start looking around, panicked, for my children’s parents. We would have to say time and time again that they’re ours. They ask my daughter, ‘Are those REALLY your brothers and sisters?’ They’ll ask how much I paid for them, where they came from, which I think are odd questions to ask someone.”
‘THOSE. ARE. MY. BROTHERS!,’ she pointed across the courtroom, yelling proudly. The boys stood to their feet, the proudest I’ve ever seen them.’: 3 adopted brothers ecstatic to attend biological sister’s adoption day after ‘tragic’ childhood
“My eyes immediately filled with tears, and I knew. I knew she remembered. She remembered all the days my boys cared for her when they should have been in their classrooms. She remembered the way they protected her. She remembered the way they loved her. She remembered the way they fought to keep them alive. She remembered.”
‘We buckled him into his booster seat in the social worker’s car and watched them drive away.’: Foster parent’s emotional response after beloved 4-year-old goes home to biological father
“That night as we sat on the couch crying, I looked at the clock. It was 8:00, the time we’d usually take him to bed. ‘I hope he’s snuggled into bed after having his favorite book read to him,’ I said. ‘I don’t,’ my husband replied. ‘I hope his dad loves him so much, and missed him so badly that he’s still just holding him, and telling him how much he loves him.'”
‘What about me?’ He sees all the babies getting adopted. He deserves a family too. Our answer was a shaky, scared ‘yes.’: Foster mom on the ‘trauma’ yet ‘joy’ when you ‘Say yes to an older child’
“Within 24 hours I went from mothering toddlers, to a 7-year-old. I wasn’t sure what to do. We were walking on eggshells, wondering when the lid would blow. I was closing his bedroom door. He stopped me. ‘Mommy, you’re a really good Mom.’ I slid down the door in silent sobs. Those words, coming from that boy, meant more than any accolade I could ever receive.”
‘Can you please stop talking about it? Why do you keep talking about it?’ She slammed her cup of milk down.’: Foster mom’s emotional realization that ‘goodbye is coming’
“I was informed today that goodbye is coming. None of us are ready. ‘It is happening for real and it is happening soon.’ I pulled out the calendar. Their eyes got wide as they realized what I was saying. We need more time.”
