friendships

‘I was doing her laundry FOR her. She was watching me fold her thong underwear. She just stood there holding the baby! This is ridiculous.’: Mom urges others to remember helping means doing so with ‘no strings attached’

“I was sitting at a coffee shop and overheard (I was eavesdropping) two women behind me. One was complaining about her daughter-in-law who’d just given birth to her grandchild. ‘I offered to help, but this ridiculous!’ she said. Here’s the thing. I’ve learned if we really want to help, we just show up. We ring their doorbell and start unloading their dishwasher or play with their kid while they take a shower. We shove a lasagna in the oven so they don’t have to think about dinner.”

‘When I’m out with you, I’m all in. I can dance, wine taste, make small talk. But then I’m done. I have an escape plan.’: Woman explains difficulties of being an ‘extroverted introvert’ during the holiday season

“I really like going out and hanging out with people, but it takes me days to recover from it. I need to lay on the couch to recoup from the mental toll it takes. People exhaust me. When my husband drinks, he becomes an energizer bunny. Me? The more I drink, the more tired I become. Once I hit that wall, there is no turning back. I am done-done-done. I can only be social for a set amount of time. If that time is up, I have an escape plan.”

‘What does DTF mean? You swipe which way? Woah, you just sent me a pic of your privates.’ Dating life as a widow is terrifying.’: Young widow recalls first heartbreak post-loss of husband, ‘It stings like hell’

“Mr. Heartbreak knew all the right things to say. He came off very genuine. We clicked immediately, talked for hours on the phone. The first time we met, I was so nervous. He had these intense eyes that looked right through me. After having a drink, we made out in his car like teenagers. He pushed my hair back from my face, told me how beautiful I was. I let myself go there. Then, just like that, ‘This is not light and fun anymore,’ he said.”

‘Does your daughter play with many kids?’ I was surprised at my parent-teacher conference.’: Mom shocked my ‘mean girl’ mentality in 6-year-olds after daughter targeted, ‘My daughter views everyone as her friend’

“It turns out, my daughter plays by herself during recess. To hear that shocked me, knowing my daughter is not shy. It’s a certain girl who won’t let others play with her. I’ve seen it firsthand. I’ve overheard that same girl mumble she ‘isn’t friends’ with my daughter. Yet my daughter is oblivious.”

‘When’s the baby coming?’ My face turns red. I’m not pregnant. I miscarried back to back and gained 40 pounds in grief weight.’: Woman battling infertility reminds us ‘words have weight’

“I’m in Starbucks. I manage a smile and lie. ‘Soon.’ I rush out the door, no coffee in hand, and cry in my jeep. ‘When are you having kids?’ ‘Have kids already!’ ‘I’m ready to be a grandma. The clock is ticking!’ they say. But when I stillbirth? No questions, words. Just silence. My husband battles silent resent. ‘No baby, no marriage.’ These weren’t the vows I signed up for.”

‘Check on your ‘strong’ friend, she’s faking it.’: Woman urges ‘let your strong friends know you’re a safe space’

“I’m the strong friend. I meet you for drinks when you’re facing disaster. I bring you dinner, flowers. I’m your sounding board. But you forgot to check on me. You ask me where I’ve been, you say I seem ‘off’ and that you miss my posts. You know what I heard? ‘Why aren’t you playing the role I need you to play?’ But I can’t play that role in life right now. I don’t have it in me.”

‘My best friend let me in on a secret. She was receiving methadone treatments for a heroin addiction. ‘What?’ I was so young and naïve.’: Woman finally breaks cycle of toxic relationships to trust her ‘intuition’

“She finally went into rehab. Not long after, she disappeared. One day, I had a guest. ‘Maya!’ I was excited to see her. She was super off and shaky. She didn’t even come into the house, just stood at the door. Immediately my heart sunk. I knew what was happening. I told her I loved her. ‘Please call me when you’re better.’”

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