“I snuck my younger children out. My 10-year-old and I grabbed the only belongings I had hidden. As we walked quietly to the door, his music stopped! I whispered, ‘FREEZE, DONT MOVE.’ With tears in my eyes I thought this was it, he knew I was escaping. ‘Run, run now!’”
‘I needed to tell, in case I went ‘missing.’ I was terrified. ‘You’ve been talking again, haven’t you?’ I ran into the bathroom. ‘Mom, please come.’ It was now or never. It HAD to happen NOW!’
‘Gunner went out with friends Friday night. They came back and stayed up playing video games, like most 19-year-olds do. At some point, Gunner, and his friend, took a pill.’
“He has no history of drug use, has never been a ‘problem child’, was a star athlete, wonderful son and was extremely loved in his community. We don’t know why he decided to take ‘a pill’ that night. Both boys died immediately.”
‘I drove high with my kids in the car. They would hear me lie through my teeth about pain I’d made up, just to get a script. My husband threatened to leave me, but I was so good at lying to him.’
“I wasn’t pregnant anymore technically, and those pills stopped more than just my physical pain – they numbed my emotions as well. I would hide pills around the house – on shelves behind clothes, in drawers, even in my kids’ rooms – anywhere.”
‘Hi Mom, I’m home, wake me up for school at 9, ok? I love you.’ I looked right at him. ‘I love you too, Alex. Get some sleep, it’s late.’ Off to bed we both went.
“When I went to wake him for school, the moment I saw him and touched his arm, I knew he was gone.”
‘If you are not the parent of a heroin addict — you are lucky. Say a prayer and stop judging.’
“I felt his words in the pit of my stomach. ‘Mom, I need help.'”
‘Dear Dad, that was shocking what you did. Please can you get help? I’m sorry drugs did that to you, but never do it again. I really miss the old you.’
“I remember sitting in that jail cell crying my eyes out, thinking my daughter, who was 9 at the time, would be in her 20’s before I saw her again. That was my true rock bottom. I can’t even begin to describe to you the utter defeat and sadness I felt that day.”
‘His mommy overdosed on heroin just feet away from him as he slept soundly in her bed.’
“I knew he was horrified by what happened and I didn’t care to belittle him or press the issue. What was done was done. At least that’s what I thought.”
‘My heroin addict.’
“I’m not sure who people picture when they think of heroin addicts, so, I’d like to introduce you to mine.”
