“Every time the hospice people asked if they could do anything for him, he would answer that he was only worried about me, his wife. I tried not to cry, because he wanted his last days to be happy and without tears. Then, I opened his work bag and found it.”
‘When we got the news death was coming soon, I was driving us home. I started crying, and couldn’t stop. He held me on the side of the interstate. Then HE took over driving.’
‘I have something I need to tell you.’ He was rubbing his hands together nervously. I looked him in the eyes, and said, ‘You can tell me anything.’ My brain couldn’t process it.’
“I sat back in my seat and thought I must have misheard him. I said, ‘Oh, but you’re fine, right?’ As if you are ever fine after this diagnosis. ‘No.’ He drew back and smiled the biggest, most beautiful smile. He knew. We both knew.”
‘This will be my Dad’s last parade. His heart is failing. All he talks about is the Memorial Day Parade – ‘Are you coming? I’ll be in my uniform.’
“We were unsure how to tell him he’s too weak to ride through the parade. Then we made the decision – we are going for it. We are putting him in his uniform and into a car, with a nurse, so one last time, he can see what he and his beloved wife did for our little town.”
‘I was 13 hours away with $1.32 in my account. Tears in my eyes, I gently opened the door. There was a look of shock on her face. ‘How did you get here?!’
“I wrote, ‘My mom is dying in hospice care and I feel guilty every day I’m not there sitting by her side.’ I awoke to something so unexpected. ‘Alex! Oh my god, Alex!’”
‘My dad told us, ‘Make someone’s day better.’ I watched him take his last breath. ‘Just because he couldn’t receive my kidney, doesn’t mean somebody else shouldn’t.’ This is for you, dad.’
“I was nervous and excited the morning of the surgery. This was finally happening! We could feel my dad’s presence in the room. We each donated to a stranger, for him.”
‘Then I received this email. ‘Hi there, My dad has been fighting cancer. Dad is getting weaker by the day. We have to do this as soon as possible.’
“I couldn’t keep it together to talk on the phone. This is a very difficult and dark time, but I know how you feel about love. We are throwing this plan together really fast. We don’t know how long we have.”
‘She wanted to crash a wedding, toilet paper a house and travel. I remember looking at her sitting there, thinking, ‘She will not be here much longer.’
“I will never forget the day she called me and told me. She was sorry and she didn’t understand why it was happening to her.”
‘It was New Year’s Eve. Midnight came. Just like that, the love of my life was gone. I’ll never forget the look on her face. She gently patted me. ‘I love you.’ That was the last time I saw her as herself.’
“The next morning, I got a call. ‘She won’t answer the phone or come to the door.’ 25 nerve-wracking minutes later, we found her. I was standing at the head of the bed. I brushed her hair with one hand, her shoulder with the other. I wish I could tell you she looked peaceful, but she didn’t. She looked scared.”
‘I’m done,’ Mom finally said. She knew my dad was waiting on the other side. I needed to know that’s what she truly wanted. She discussed it with such peace and ease.’
“I was 4 months pregnant with baby number three. I arrived at her house to find her completely confused and disheveled. Something was very wrong. We rushed over to the ER. Mom was admitted. Funny how the relationship roles reversed.”
‘We decided to fight for Oliver. His dad said, ‘If you’re in, I’m in.’ I was extremely nervous. He looked right into my eyes the moment we met.’
“What would we tell his big brother? The results came back negative, so we were left with no answers. I was then approached by a family member who informed me of a syndrome that had affected boys born into my family in the past.”
