“This is the look of a strong-willed girl who knows exactly what she’s doing. Look how proud she is!”
‘The photographer asked, ‘Would you like to retake the photo without the tooth sticking out?’ She replied, ‘Nope, I’m good!’ She doesn’t conform to societal standards.’: Mom admires ‘strong-willed’ daughter after hilarious school photos
‘As I was in the bathroom I heard a rustling noise. I figured it was a mouse. As I lifted my eyes to scan, mid-wipe, my eyes met another pair of eyes. IT WASN’T A MOUSE.’: Woman hilariously recounts embarrassing bathroom mishap
“‘HELLO! I’m in here.’ I think he knew I was ‘in’ there. I just don’t think his brain could process what he was seeing. He saw a bodacious woman, full-frontal from the waist down, wiping…her…backside.”
‘The server dropped off the check, and that’s when I realized. WHERE IS MY DEBIT CARD?’: Mom hilariously recounts ‘missing’ debit card, ‘I am NOT made for adulting’
“It’s not in my pockets. Not in my car. Not on the kitchen counter. So, I skivvy down for my sadness shower and… wait. Stuck to my boob. Because OBVIOUSLY.”
‘The pregnancy test read, ‘Yaaaaaaas!’ before I had time to pull up my pants. There I was, knocked up with my post-vasectomy baby.’: Mom hilariously recounts vasectomy fail
“At 40 years old, post-vasectomy, we thought my husband was shootin’ blanks. All I could do was laugh out of shock. Very quickly followed by a much larger part of me saying, ‘Oh…sh*t…’ As I stood up and washed my hands, I was overcome with a feeling of dread.”
‘I yelled, ‘Omg Logan, THERE’S POOP!’ My child was BATHING in his own poo while I read about dancing with the stars on my phone.’: Mom hilariously recounts bath time gone wrong
“When I heard Simon toot and laugh because it made more bubbles, I thought nothing of it. I decided to investigate deeper into whether Hannah B. and Alan would actually fall in love on Dancing with the Stars. As I’m pep talking him for the face wash, I see a brown object between the fading tub bubbles.”
‘HEELLLLPPPP!!! I STUCK!!!’ Stepping out of the shower, I heard a hysterical call for help from my toddler.’: Woman hilariously ‘saves’ daughter, ‘The things we do for our kids’
“I didn’t have time to put on clothes. ‘HEEELLPP!! HELP MomMY!’ I rushed my bare ass out of the shower. In what felt like negative 1 million degrees, my frosty ass was jiggling down the hall, picturing all sorts of ludicrous situations.”
‘Cancer didn’t stop him from being the best dad. If anything, it magnified who he was and what was important.’: Young widow shares husband’s selflessness, despite battling cancer
“We didn’t have two pennies to rub together, so our ‘treat’ was Arby’s. It was so cold, and the employees were trying to kick a homeless man out of the restaurant. Matt walked to the register, bought him a meal, sat it down in front of him, and told him to eat real slow and stay as long as he wanted. There was no one who was immune to the goodness of Matt’s heart.”
‘Today my husband asked, ‘Why is there a pen in the fridge?’ I had no idea what he was talking about. ‘What kind of pen?’: Woman urges ‘we’re all losing your mind trying to keep it together’
“I’m tired of worrying. I’m tired of hearing about politics. I’m tired of trying to learn about coronavirus. I’m tired of the overwhelming amount of learning I need to do, almost daily, in order to keep up with what all is going on in the world right now. Y’all. I am tired. My tired is tired.”
‘Every time Rich comes to deliver, I am in my best clothes. As his eyes climbed up, he stopped briefly at my chest and looked away.’: Mom suffers hilarious wardrobe malfunction during delivery, ‘There were two dark dots staring at him’
“I heard a knock, and I knew it was Rich. My beloved. Bringer of dreams. Rich gave me his million dollar smile then the color drained from his face. I shut the door, go to the mirror to check out the damage. There were two dark dots staring at him.”
‘Right—THERE! MOMMY! NO! A CAR JUST SQUASHED IT!’ I pumped the brakes, started directing traffic. I was hyperventilating.’: Hero mom saves lizard
“‘Sir, can you take it to a hospital?’ He pulled his truck past me and tipped his hat. ‘Hail nawl, little lady. That thang is all on you.’ Pretty soon I was standing alone, next to my car, with a half-dead thing in a shoe box that was IN MY HANDS. I was hyperventilating. This was not okay.”
