“We got to know our birth mother. We bonded over our dreams for this child. But, something about her didn’t feel right. She knew exactly what she was doing, and who she was playing. She knew all about me and my infertility. And she knew we would do anything to help her, because that’s the kind of people we are.”
‘She’d ask for money. The knots in my stomach grew. Then, our attorney called. Our birth mother had been working with 4 other families, promising her baby to them too. We’d been scammed.’
‘I ran to the laundry room. Something told me to put my hands in the washing machine. I resisted. No way. Are you kidding me? Of course he is not in the washing machine.’
“I had a top loading washer and always let Ollie help me throw a few items in – don’t most moms let their kids help? I called his name. No answer. Silence. Nothing. The air began to be very thick. How could this have happened with me only 15 feet away, in the same house?!”
‘I had jealousy and hatred for my husband. I imagined him enjoying his 40-minute commute, sipping his hot coffee at his desk, and having adult chats NOT about the color of poo.’
“You’re used to being a high-flying businesswoman, and now you’re sitting on the floor with a load of people who all seem to know the words to ‘Baa Baa Black Sheep!’ I was bloody mad!”
‘Garry!’ I yelled, grabbing his face. ‘Garry, wake up!’ I screamed at him. There was no response other than the awful snoring and shaking. I bolted across my yard to pound on my neighbor’s door.’
“I awoke with a startle. I’d only been asleep for an hour when a strange sound roused me. There it was again, coming from my husband’s side of the bed; a strange snoring sound, except it wasn’t snoring. Something wasn’t right. He was shaking. My babies were sleeping soundly in their beds.”
‘My daughter lost her mind, tantrum, tears, because ‘Talking Booty Baby’ lost her head, literally. It was dangling. ‘Mommy please fix her!!!’ She was devastated. Tears streamed down her cheeks.’
“A few months ago, my boys colored with pen all over Talking Booty Baby’s face and I thought world was coming to an end. But that was NOTHING compared to what happened the other day. Oh no, no, no.”
‘My husband complains I never tell him what I want for Mother’s Day. I want to be as clear as possible. Don’t say you DON’T know what we want.’
“3. A break from the kids. Sure, we are celebrating being a mom, but our ideal celebration doesn’t include wiping butts or picking up LEGOs. Give us this day off, please.”
‘I’ve never had real parents before. I’ve waited my entire life to be treated the way y’all treat me.’ Couple adopts 18-year-old who was ‘abandoned by his birth mother with no name’
“‘So you are the people that want teenagers… are you crazy?’ I said, ‘Something like that.’ She replied, ‘Well, I got a phone call in your driveway for a 16-year-old male who needs a home by tonight.’ I told her, ‘Bring him home.’ My husband looked at me like I was crazy. But he agreed. ‘She’s right, bring him home.’”
‘My husband left me after going into a depression. He just kept saying it was ‘his problem.’ He decided this life, our life, wasn’t for him.’
“He was stuck in a marriage he didn’t want to be in. The night we separated he told me he loved me but, ‘Not in that way’ anymore. He told me not to cry, he couldn’t handle it. I couldn’t breathe.”
‘He told me he was my master. He demanded complete obedience. He was always disappearing. He told me it was my fault. He told me I was crazy.’
“He took me to expensive restaurants. He remembered my favorite wine. He let me spend the night. I spent all my energy trying to impress him. I didn’t want to be a single mom. I didn’t want to be alone. I made the hardest decision of my life.”
‘Motherhood is not a funeral to your old life. You don’t need to mourn it anymore. What makes ME happy? No more guilt.’
“Do you ever sit down at the end of the night, after wiping down another counter, and think, where have I gone? When the only time you have to yourself is the 5 minutes you lay in bed utterly exhausted and fight to stay awake to just have one minute, one second, to be yourself again. Do you ever miss the old you? Me too.”
