“I looked up from my bed and saw my mother and sister at the door. The look in their eyes is something I never want to see again. I feared that I had to be cured. I wish I had seen the warning signs.’
‘If you EVER speak out, I know where the bullets are.’ I walked in the snow for miles in short sleeves. I woke up in the hospital, angry I survived, and pulled out all the hospital tubes.’
‘I was going to donate to her fund, but I found out her parents are lesbian. Sorry.’ My wife received this horrible message. We were so hurt.’
“We got a 3D ultrasound to find out the sex. It’s a GIRL! I bought hair bows and tutus. We were beyond excited. She was born perfect and healthy. No one knew she was hiding a secret illness. After realizing our sick child has two mommies, she couldn’t donate.”
‘I woke up next to my beloved husband with our 3 children across the hall, and realized I am no longer straight.’
“I paused what I was doing, took a deep breath, and asked, ‘Would you like to know something interesting about me?’ He said, ‘Yes, babe.’ He stopped washing the dishes, and turned to me. I broke down crying.”
‘We both rolled over in bed and said the words. Me: ‘I’m gay.’ Her: ‘I’m transgender.’ Silence. Now what? I’m married. HAPPILY married!’
“Somewhere in between having our boys, small changes started to occur in Sarah’s wardrobe. I thought it was strange. IF this was something, could I stick around? Was I ok with this? Could I still love her?”
‘Wait! I am 29 years old. I won’t poop my pants. That’s ridiculous.’ I didn’t want to bother my wife. I didn’t want her to panic that I was home alone. ‘I think it’s time. I think I’m in labor.’
“But let’s start at beginning. My wife and I met in high school. It wasn’t love at first sight, or even attraction at first site. In fact, I wasn’t even into women.”
‘My wife sat me down. ‘We are going to adopt.’ l couldn’t bear letting her down. I wanted to yell out, ‘That’s not fair to the child.’ I had my first panic attack.’
“Despite my ‘advanced maternal age,’ everything looked great. We naively thought getting pregnant would be easy for us. I felt stuck in the middle of two worlds.”
‘We got THE CALL. ‘Would you be willing to accept a 3-month-old baby with serious medical needs?’ Our girl had endured more in those first 3 months than most do in a lifetime.’
“The thought of leaving her at school left me breathless. Would her teacher know what she needed? What if she was sad? Would she be scared? Made fun of by other kids for the ‘funny way’ she spoke? While our love and commitment to her never wavered for a second, it was earth shattering to hear.”
‘We are expecting twins. But, not just ANY twins. Neither of us had words in that moment. We sat together on the bed and just held each other. There were no words.’
“Before we were even ‘out,’ the church preschool where we both worked found out about our relationship and fired us. We were told we were living a life of sin.”
‘When I wiped, I felt something coming out. My world came crashing down. I got a sick feeling in my stomach – I knew what was about to happen.’
“I laid on that cold bed, put my feet in the stirrups and prayed. After moments that felt like forever, my doctor looked up at me. ‘You’re having twins!’ We were in shock. But seconds later, our doctor had a weird look on her face. She said, ‘Wait! I think I see triplets!’”
‘It was so simple for me to accidentally get pregnant with my twins. Why couldn’t I do this for my wife?! I felt as if I was failing her. Something I never wanted to do.’
“This was something we both wanted SO badly, yet everything was going horribly wrong. This wasn’t full of whispers and giggles and kisses like we had thought. This was full of frustration, anger, and disappointment.”