listen

‘My 16-year-old was upset over a fight with a friend. When I really listened, it turns out this friend has been making her feel ‘less than’ for months.’: One mom’s approach to ‘listening’ vs. ‘action’ conversations helped relationship with teens

“What I’ve learned after trying it for a couple of months is that it’s much harder for me to shut up and not shove my opinion down their throats or try to solve their problems for them than I thought. I figured they’d be the ones unable to play by the ground rules, but it was a big lesson for me as well.”

‘Next time just shut up and listen.’ I’d been married 13 years. I’ll be honest, his advice pissed me off.’: Husband shocked random advice was actually correct, ‘You don’t need to fix her problems. Just listen to her’

“She was frustrated. With each concern I told her I could ‘fix it.’ I told her to calm down (not a wise move, I know) and with each ‘fix it,’ she grew more frustrated. ‘You’re not getting it!’ And hung up. He laughed. ‘She isn’t worried about you fixing anything,’ he said. ‘She wanted to vent.’ Naturally, I let out a condescending breath.”

Ten true things about the first year of motherhood

“Postpartum bodies are squashy and wobbly and dimpled and stretched and foreign and embarrassing and difficult and painful and gorgeously imperfect, and they tend to stay that way for quite awhile. You made a human. Now make your peace.”

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