listening

‘My 16-year-old was upset over a fight with a friend. When I really listened, it turns out this friend has been making her feel ‘less than’ for months.’: One mom’s approach to ‘listening’ vs. ‘action’ conversations helped relationship with teens

“What I’ve learned after trying it for a couple of months is that it’s much harder for me to shut up and not shove my opinion down their throats or try to solve their problems for them than I thought. I figured they’d be the ones unable to play by the ground rules, but it was a big lesson for me as well.”

‘Next time just shut up and listen.’ I’d been married 13 years. I’ll be honest, his advice pissed me off.’: Husband shocked random advice was actually correct, ‘You don’t need to fix her problems. Just listen to her’

“She was frustrated. With each concern I told her I could ‘fix it.’ I told her to calm down (not a wise move, I know) and with each ‘fix it,’ she grew more frustrated. ‘You’re not getting it!’ And hung up. He laughed. ‘She isn’t worried about you fixing anything,’ he said. ‘She wanted to vent.’ Naturally, I let out a condescending breath.”

‘He was terrified he’d watch her leap off the bridge. He pushed forward, to ‘catch her feet’ if she went over the rails.’: Son saves stranger from near suicide attempt, ‘if you hear someone calling out for help, you can’t turn away’

“We couldn’t find our son anywhere. We were stunned to hear what happened in the time he’d been ‘missing.’ As he came upon the bridge, he saw an outline of a person perched on the railing with her body leaning over the top, looking down toward the raging river. Eventually, she looked back at him with a terrifying look in her eyes. ‘How can I help?,’ he asked.”

‘She chanted ‘Peppa’ while holding the stupid thing to her chest. ‘No,’ I said, embarrassed.’: Dad faced with difficult decision learns boundaries with children, ‘It sucked. But I did it.’

“I pried the toy out of her arms, her screaming like I actually removed a limb, me trying not to hurt her, wondering if she was actually Thor because of her freakishly strong grip. I hauled Aspen out of the store underneath my arm, her legs kicking. I looked at her in the backseat, and wondered if I’d done the right thing.”

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