loss of parent

‘I love you, sweetie. I’ll call you Friday.’ Those words will forever haunt me. I received a call from my mom when school ended. ‘This is the hardest thing I’ll ever tell you.’ I fell to the floor.’

“My heart sank. I could tell by her voice I had to get home. I still hear the words as she fought back breaking down. ‘We have to go. We have to get there!’ I remember having thought, ‘He seems better. He seems more like himself.’ My dad was back. Boy, was I wrong.”

‘My mother traded my sister for a shotgun and pickup truck. I didn’t see her again for 35 years. One day, I got the clever idea to place an ad in the local newspaper. In 1 month, I got THE call.’

“We met at a run-down cafe and I asked all the questions that burned inside me. I was sitting directly across from her. This time, she couldn’t ignore me. I secretly hoped my suspicions were wrong, but the realistic side of me always said, ‘April, why else would she have stayed away?'”

‘During my pregnancy, my dad came to me in a dream. He was holding a baby boy wrapped in a pale blue blanket. He walked towards me. It’s the only memory I have of them together.’

“We had chosen to wait on finding out the gender until birth, but I knew when waking up that the little boy inside me would be a boy. I’ll never hear you tell him you love him or sing him to sleep. He will never see you on the sidelines, cheering him on. But I know you were taking care of him before it was my turn to.”

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