loss parent

‘I placed him in a box, handing him off to a stranger. ‘I love you, Ren,’ I whispered to my son.’: Father tearfully recalls needing to be the ‘superhero’ after losing newborn, ‘I began to break’

“As my wife looked at his little face, she asked me to hand her a wet washcloth. Confused, I then watched as she began to softly dab his little dried up lips. She nurtured and cared for our little boy’s fragile body. I have so much gratitude to this woman. How strong she is. Not only did she say hello to our son for the first time, but soon, she was going to be forced to say goodbye. The thought haunted me.”

‘Where did you get these?’ I knew. ‘Ren’s nursery.’ He didn’t realize how serious I was. ‘Put them back.’: Wife unexpectedly triggered by husband’s attempt at act of kindness, ‘It was all downhill from there’

“We ran out of toilet paper and Tommy was supposed to go to the store. Irritated, I asked him to get me something to use. Maybe a paper towel? He finally walks in holding a pack of wipes. They were a very specific kind, Huggies all-natural wipes. I started tearing up. ‘Put them back, please.’ He laughed and insisted I used them. He didn’t realize how serious I was until I started bawling. Something in his room was now out of place.”

‘I’m sorry buddy,’ I heard him whisper. He laid him down. Just like that, Ren was gone.’: Couple’s emotional final moments with newborn son, ‘We feel your peace, you’ll always be our baby boy’

“We got a knock on the door. ‘I’m sorry for your loss, I’m here to take Ren.’ I couldn’t get myself to physically lay Ren in the box. I turned to my husband and asked if he was okay to do it. I saw his heart rip in two. Tears streamed down his face. We tried to take in every detail, remember his newborn smell. We gently took off the cap they gave him. He had tiny little blonde curls.”

‘The OB dropped my newborn. ‘It’s OK, you’re young. You’ll have more.’: Mom appalled by preemie’s treatment in child birth, hopes other child loss parents ‘never feel alone’

“Before I left, I turned back. I could see the heartbreak on my dad’s face. I was yelling bloody murder through the halls. They put my legs up. All I remember were bright lights and hearing, ‘Push! Keep pushing! He’s almost out!’ They failed to catch him. I finally got a call from my OB. She said her condolences. ‘I’m so sorry, I never predicted this.’”

‘Is he your first?’ My heart starts racing. My palms go sweaty. It’s a simple question, but I panic.’: Mom of 4 child losses ‘filled with guilt’ over complicated answer in grocery store parking lot

“My son Wyatt waves from the grocery cart. My voice cracks. ‘Yes, he’s our first,’ I muster out. He smiles at us. My eyes tear up and immediately, I’m filled with guilt as I push the cart and walk away. The truth is, the real answer is much too complicated for a stranger. We have 5 children, but he is the first we brought home.”

‘What happened, buddy? What happened?’ I laid down next to him, held his hand. An eerie calm came over me.’: Father pleads ‘hug your kids, don’t work too late’ after regretting ‘missing out on things’ with twin son who suddenly died in his sleep

“The evening before was normal. He was healthy and engaged. We had kids over for dinner. We all jumped on the giant trampoline. He got bossy with the other kids and started telling everyone they were playing the game wrong. I pulled him aside. I was stern with him. Too stern in hindsight. And I made him cry. It’s one of the last interactions we had, and I’ve beaten myself up for it. I can still see the tears rolling down his face. ‘But you’re not listening to me. No one listens to me.’”

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