“I see you. Scrolling through your phone, measuring yourself to the highlight reel of friends and family. Looking at the other mamas in school drop off and at work wondering how they make it look so easy. Can I be honest with you? It’s an illusion.”
‘That ‘perfect’ mom, she’s a myth. The one you’re comparing yourself to? She doesn’t have it all together either. She might just be better at hiding it.’ Woman encourages moms to embrace their imperfections
‘I’ve given birth. The world is gonna get whatever’s in THIS swimsuit. I have a swimsuit and a body. So YES, I already have a swimsuit body!’ Mom has ‘99 problems and a summer body ain’t one’
“Is there any part of the year that puts more pressure on us women to be ‘snatched’ than summer? After giving birth, swimsuits fit weird and my belly is CLEARLY visible. My rapidly changing size made me doubt what was appropriate for a ‘bigger woman’ at the pool.”
‘I can do this, right?’ I scanned the faces around me, absolutely mortified. ‘Of course. Just take your shirt off!’ Peopled waved, said hello. Where were the looks of disgust?!’ Mom embraces plus-size beach body to set example for daughter
“I spent years trying to sabotage my marriage in hopes he’d leave me for someone skinny. Day after day, I’d tell myself how nasty, disgusting, fat I was. I had no idea my gorgeous daughter was listening. She started saying how fat she was. How ugly. I was HORRIFIED. I knew I needed to make a change.”
‘I love my family and friends. I genuinely do. But those dearest can wear me out. I NEED to be alone sometimes.’ Woman explains why the need for alone time is not a ‘personality flaw’
“My husband and I recently took our daughter on a 5-day road trip. We returned to host family, barbecue with friends. I loved every bit of it. I did. But then I crashed. I wanted nothing more than a nap in a dark, quiet room. I was 100%, without a doubt, suffering from a social hangover. I love people, but peopling requires lots of energy.”
‘I no longer speak to my mom. Every day, I wonder about her. I look in the mirror and see her staring back. But I have to choose me over her.’
“Every day, I’m reminded that I’ve never felt the love of a mom. I know if I open the door to her, she’ll destroy me and all the progress I’ve made. I’m hurt and sad, but I’m also better off. You do not need to have a toxic person in your life just because you share DNA.”
‘I removed my breast implants. Within minutes, I was attacked by a man. ‘You look like a little boy. Where did your breasts go?’ It felt like a punch in my gut.’
“He proceeded to tell me that smaller chests were meant for middle school and that real women had ‘grown up’ bodies. Ouch.”
‘I’m not everyone’s cup of tea. I’m too loud. Too quiet. A mom who could lose a few pounds. We try so hard to bend 50 different ways to fit a mold. But, why? For what?’
“We worry what others think. Why we didn’t get the invite. We over-analyze texts. We see glances, hear whispers, and assume they’re directed at us. People aren’t always going to agree with you. In fact, some people aren’t going to like you for no other reason than because they can.”
‘My phone rings. ‘I don’t have time for this. I need to get my kids.’ Then my mouth dropped. We were greeted by 2 officers as we drove down the long gravel driveway.’
“I had already popped a bunch of pills and drank a bunch of Vodka. ‘I want to see him!’ I screamed, shaking profusely. My mom said, ‘No, you don’t. He shot and killed himself with a 12-gauge shotgun in his mouth.’ I look at my phone. It reads, ‘I love you.’ 6:24 pm.”
‘He caught me off guard. ‘Let’s meet.’ Weeks later, the inevitable happened. My fairy tale was under attack. My sorority sisters called the police, who brought me to the hospital. It’s all hazy.’
“I started to see signs all around me. It seemed as though clues were everywhere and everyone was in on it. I had no words, but the real me was crying out, ‘What is going on?!’ I couldn’t explain what was happening to me. My mind was stripped of everything.”
‘There’s no quick fix. There WILL always be a next panic attack, a next day of self-harm or cloud of doubt. I started to feel I wasn’t enough for him. I couldn’t pray away the dark times.’
“There’s nothing I want more than to see his beautiful smile. But part of being in love with someone struggling with mental health is dealing with the ugly. It’s true what they say. There is always a light at the end of the tunnel. But there’s also a damn dimmer switch in that tunnel too.”
