“To be fair, I didn’t know it was a family heirloom. I have made these kinds of mistakes a lot in life.”

‘When I was in college, I loaned my mom’s family heirloom table to a stripper.’

‘I take him to the doctor. ‘It’s an emergency!’ I remembered someone put sliced potatoes in their child’s sock, and it helped them feel better. No runny nose, he was cured. So, I did it!’
“I’ll tell you what it DID do. It made my husband think I had lost my mind when the baby is screaming and instead of being with him, I’m in the kitchen stomping around, gathering potatoes like a farmer and trying to slice them like I’m prepping to scalloped potatoes, like a mad woman, chanting, ‘Potatoes! He needs potatoes!’”

‘I get angry when my children misbehave. I get embarrassed when they make too much noise. I’m in charge; I’m in control; I’m the one calling the shots.’
“I made a mistake. I almost didn’t know it. I nearly allowed it to be my story.”

‘I didn’t love my daughter at first sight. I look at that picture and cringe. I just wanted to be left alone. I felt so heartless.’
“There the nurse was, taking this baby’s head and shoving it into my boob to start breastfeeding. ‘She’s your baby!’ I would tell myself, ‘just bond with her.’ I’ve made a huge mistake here.”

‘Marriage 2! This one only lasted 9 months. I was broke. He was not. He drove a nice car. He treated us to things. I’m not proud of this.’
“Then one night, he poured me a glass of wine. I took a sip and saw something in the bottom of my glass. No… It can’t be what I think it is. Can I keep drinking and pretend I don’t see it?”

‘I let Addison pick out her dress for picture day. She chose a sparky green dress. I didn’t think anything of it – until I received the email with her proofs.’
“Y’all. THIS IS THE BEST MISTAKE I HAVE EVER DONE. There are 87 styles. I NEED THEM ALL.”

Getting pregnant at 15 was not a ‘dumb, teenage mistake.’ I wish I hadn’t remained silent.
“I was coerced into having an abortion by my parents who threatened to abandon me if I chose to continue my pregnancy. We were the typical Suburban facade, our lawn dyed as green as my parents were supportive.”

‘He’s crushed and I’m dying laughing’: Dad hilariously replies to daughter’s tweet about his ‘disbelief, anger’ over Red Hot Chili Peppers concert instead being ‘PIPERS’
“I was driving around Evansville, Indiana, and saw a billboard for what I thought was the Red Hot Chili Peppers coming to The Victory Theatre in August. I didn’t get a great look at the billboard.”