“In addition to planning two funerals, my husband and I were left with a room full of baby items. Three boppy pillows, three bouncers, enough diapers for three little babies. I waited in line to return it all. The grief took a hold of me.”
‘The checkout lady saw my cart. ‘Oh wow! Did you get too many things on your registry?’ Tears poured down my face. ‘No, two of my children died,’ I said. ‘I don’t need these anymore.’
‘My sweet boy, oh how I wish we could bring you home. I cannot fathom why you were too sweet for this world, and meant only for heaven. I yearn for the day to hold you again.’
“Little man, your home is a brick house in Missouri. There is a white dogwood and a rod iron fence in the front yard. You have two sisters who would dote and adore you. I imagine you would have been tormented with bows, jewelry and nail polish! I wish your home was with your family, rather than heaven.”
‘Jeremy had no intention of having more children or getting married again. We tied the knot, and started the process of reversing his vasectomy. My first thought was, ‘Here we go.’
“I told Jeremy, ‘I just don’t feel right.’ He took me to the ER. I had a bad feeling. ‘I’m sorry, but you are normal, so we really have no answers.’ I remember asking him, ’Do you even care?'”
‘GET HIM AWAY FROM ME!’ I pushed him toward my husband’s lap. I resented him. I felt out of body. Then, BOOM. We were home.’
“Then, everything shifted. ‘You don’t have CANCER, you can GET OVER IT’. My husband was like a deer in the headlights. The phone rings. What? How? I can’t do this AGAIN without them.”
‘I heard her in the hall, talking about the ‘awful day’ she was having, and all the’ rough news’ she was having to break to families. When she entered, everything changed.’
“‘Can my day just be done?,’ I heard her say. She then said a word that took me by surprise, and scared me: ‘Abort.’”
‘I peeked in her bedroom. As I walked closer, I looked at her white feet and knew something was wrong. My brain snapped.’ Mother tragically loses daughter to Sudden Unexplained Death in Childhood
“‘I’m sorry, we have to do this when a child dies in the home. It’s so hard for you,’ the investigator said. They found no cause of death. It is so rare, and the last thing I want to do is cause fear in someone else, but it’s a very real and possible thing that can happen.”
‘I received a message that stopped me in my tracks and brought me to tears. Big, waterfall, sobbing tears. Scarlett would never want this for me. She was love and joy personified.’
“Hello, we were gifted a gift card in memory of Scarlett. I came across your family’s story. The date matches what the man mentioned. I was very stressed, adding numbers in my head trying to get my daughter what she needed for school when this happened. I sat in my car afterwards and cried.”
‘I gave birth to my sixth baby just six weeks ago. I have porn star-sized boobs as my milk finally came in. I’m wondering if I’ll ever look ‘normal down there’ ever again.’
“We all are so well prepared through pregnancy. Now, it feel like I’m giving birth all over again when I poop. I’m wearing mesh panties and bought more when I ran out of my hospital stash.”
‘Our life came to a halt. Our son was gravely ill. Looks can be deceiving. I tell him how guilty I am. His eyes become glassy. ‘I’m OK. I have a son,’ he says with a smile. I begin to sob.’
“As we pack up our belongings and head to the car, my husband can tell something is off. The moment we get into the car, I break down. We had been faced with the unimaginable. Two of our children passed away.”
‘I gave birth to a beautiful Chinese baby in which I share zero genes with. HE DIDN’T GET THE MEMO.’
“I now had a 4-year-old, a 2-year-old, and I was newly divorced. ‘How were you able to give up the baby?’ I felt like I signed my life away. They needed to make sure I wasn’t going to go crazy.”
