NICU warrior

‘There are concerns in the ultrasound.’ My doctor used scare tactics to push me into terminating my baby. I tried not to break down.’ Mom fights back after being pressured to abort baby with brain defects 

“My doctor told the story of another mom’s heartache to scare me into doing what she wanted me to do. Why was she pushing termination on me SO hard? And why the heck was she calling to tell me over the phone?! Not ONCE did she apologize or say, ‘I’m so sorry.’ Instead, she told me how to parent.”

‘The day my baby died, I won tickets to build her a bear. ‘Can I still use them even though she passed?’ Their response? ‘No. The guest must be present.’ My heart shattered in a million pieces.’

“It felt like the perfect thing to do in order to honor and remember her. All I wanted was my baby back. I wanted to be like all the other moms who get to cuddle and snuggle their baby after they are born. A simple no would’ve been okay, but their words felt like a stab to the heart.”

‘Come feel this,’ the doctor said. I put my hand on her belly. My heart sank.’ Mom recalls daughter’s rare cancer diagnosis after thinking it was just an ‘umbilical cord hernia’

“I snapped the traditional well-check picture of my daughter sitting on the exam table, bragging about our healthy girl. We were about to walk out with a good bill of health when the doctor asked me if I had any concerns. That’s when I remembered her large tummy. He laid her down on the exam table, and his face quickly changed to reflect my concern.”

‘I’m not attached to my baby. There, I said it.’

“It’s a harsh reality to admit, and I’m sure I’ll get a few gasps. But it’s the honest truth. And I know I’m not alone. I shrug off compliments from strangers about my pregnancy. This is my coping mechanism.”

‘I yelled to my husband, ‘This is the only child you’re getting, I can’t do this again!’ The doctor had to take the baby out in a split second. He was purple, had the cord around his neck, not crying.’

“The waiting game absolutely killed me. I was crying, desperate and confused. I felt like somebody was trying to take my baby away. My husband and I had to plan to spend time together. Our marriage and our relationship come before everything, and we don’t take it lightly.”

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