overcoming abuse

‘I regret this so much. I’ll never see my daughter again.’ My lips turned gray, my skin white. I faded out of consciousness.’: Woman urges ‘it will get better’ after survived suicide attempt, ‘Storms don’t last forever’

“I was always told, ‘You will never be anything.’ My family didn’t believe I was struggling. I was very good at hiding it. When it did show, they called it a ‘phase.’ I convinced myself no one would notice if I was dead. I had made my decision. Nobody could change my mind. In my bedroom, I wrote my goodbyes and I did it. I started going in and out of consciousness. I could see bright colors. My vision went blurry.”

‘She is so beautiful, now I’m taking her away,’ he said, laughing, when my daughter was born. He took her in his arms.’: Woman discovers abusive boyfriend has secret family, ‘His wife told me, ‘I don’t care anymore, you can keep him if you want.’

“He left his social media open. I found chats with several girls. I made screenshots of all the conversations and printed them out. He said he was ‘only with me for citizenship’ and that a year from then, he would shoot me. I was terrified. I discovered he had a wife with 2 children. His oldest daughter was named the same as mine. His plan was to get me pregnant, marry me, and then bring his wife and children here, kicking us out of the house. I’d trusted him, but I am not weak anymore.”

‘You’re stupid, and you’re worthless, and you’re a failure, and you should just die.’: College graduate discusses battles with Depression and PTSD

“My own self-worth was now completely dependent on how well I was doing in school. I turned to binge drinking and partying on the weekends to cope with the immense pressure I felt throughout the week. I did not know how to express my pain or ask for help, I only knew to bottle things up and press on, and so I did. I felt dead inside already, I’d hit my rock bottom. I decided I was going to get serious help.”

‘He can’t save you.’ I was 5, lying on the floor with the covers pulled tight, my father holding a gun to my mother’s head.’: Woman overcomes abusive childhood, relationship, ‘I’m fighting to break the cycle’

“He cheated when I was 8 months pregnant. Somehow, it was my fault. ‘I’d never cheat and the baby isn’t even mine,’ he told me, even though I hadn’t been with anyone else. The next time he cheated, it was with my best friend. ‘Did you know Mary was opening a diner?’ It all made sense now! He had been having an affair and they were opening a cafe together! I knew I needed to file for divorce, but how?”

‘At 15, I caught the attention of an older man. ‘You’re jailbait. You could ruin my life.’ He blamed me for the entire affair.’: Autistic woman escapes domestic abuse, ‘It is not my job to carry his pain’

“I didn’t understand at the time, but he was triggering autistic meltdowns. He objectified me constantly and often talked publicly about my genitalia, how no man had ‘had me before.’ Months before my 20th birthday, I proudly displayed a photo of my brother in uniform on the TV, which was ‘too imposing.’ I immediately threw my belongings into a trash bag. It was like a light bulb went off in my head.”

‘When he hit me the first time, I fought back like an animal. Until I had to decide if I wanted to be the woman who fought back or the woman who lived.’: Woman details journey through physical, emotional abuse, ‘I have an incredible life now’

“He showed up at my house. I was convinced I was going to die. I was obsessively checking my yard each morning for rat poison in case the dogs went out. I was afraid. Afraid I’d have to fight him off. I just wanted to be strong enough to survive. When I realized I could deadlift his body weight, I felt less afraid.”

 Share  Tweet