Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness Month

‘I’m sorry buddy,’ I heard him whisper. He laid him down. Just like that, Ren was gone.’: Couple’s emotional final moments with newborn son, ‘We feel your peace, you’ll always be our baby boy’

“We got a knock on the door. ‘I’m sorry for your loss, I’m here to take Ren.’ I couldn’t get myself to physically lay Ren in the box. I turned to my husband and asked if he was okay to do it. I saw his heart rip in two. Tears streamed down his face. We tried to take in every detail, remember his newborn smell. We gently took off the cap they gave him. He had tiny little blonde curls.”

‘Can I see my boy for one more goodbye?’ A nurse gave him his first and only haircut. He was truly perfect.’: Couple loses son to stillbirth, anxious about new pregnancy, ‘My first is in heaven, I’ll meet him there someday’

“We rushed into the emergency room. I was bleeding so badly I thought I was going to die right there in the hospital alone. My husband was stuck checking me in for what seemed like forever. The events that happened next took place so fast, but as I look back on it now, the initial care I was given makes me so mad and sad. Once she finally realized the severity of what was happening, she ran for back up. I wanted to follow him right up to heaven. I begged God to take me too.”

‘She took her last breath in her daddy’s arms. She was absolutely beautiful, perfect. I wouldn’t survive.’: 18-year-old parents lose daughter at 20-days-old, says ‘you never get over it’

“‘There is nothing more we can do.’ We counted her tiny fingers, toes. She had my nose, and the most stunning blue-green eyes. We held her hand, stroked her hair. It was the first and last time my husband got to hold his daughter. The little girl whose name he chose. The nurse wrapped her in a white blanket and handed her to me. I took in every detail of her beautiful face, holding her tiny hand until all warmth was gone.”

‘The OB dropped my newborn. ‘It’s OK, you’re young. You’ll have more.’: Mom appalled by preemie’s treatment in child birth, hopes other child loss parents ‘never feel alone’

“Before I left, I turned back. I could see the heartbreak on my dad’s face. I was yelling bloody murder through the halls. They put my legs up. All I remember were bright lights and hearing, ‘Push! Keep pushing! He’s almost out!’ They failed to catch him. I finally got a call from my OB. She said her condolences. ‘I’m so sorry, I never predicted this.’”

‘He opened his beautiful, dark grey eyes, wise beyond his years. We made him comfortable, and waited.’: Mom vows ‘as long as I live, Daniel’s memory will too’ after losing son to congenital heart defect

“At the end of this long, exhausting appointment, Charity says, ‘Oh, and congratulations on your baby.’ Congratulations on our baby? You mean the one you told me is going to die? I ran out of that room so fast. Despite it all, his broken heart kept beating. I recall a single tear escaping my eye and falling on his face.”

‘Mom she’s gone, I just know.’ I sat on my stairs with my front door open, in shock.’: How this ‘broken’ mother helps other parents of child loss heal after her own tragedy

“Seeing my sweet baby girl laying in a huge bed, much too big for her, made me fall to my knees. A nurse said to me, ‘Get off the floor, it’s so dirty.’ I was angry at her, I was angry at the hospital chaplain placing his eerie hand on my shoulder with no real comfort. No parent should have to write their child’s eulogy, or decide between a casket or an urn. I had absolutely no idea what I was doing.”

‘She looked at me and said, ‘Mommy I heard you crying. Are you ok?’ ‘The baby is in heaven now.’: Family strives to overcome pregnancy loss

“We said our final goodbyes by attending a shared burial. Our baby, along with 30 or so others, were buried all together in a beautiful little white casket. At the end of the service, each family had a chance to spend a few moments with all the babies in the casket. My husband, the girls and I all walked hand-in-hand slowly up front.”

‘We ended up accidentally getting pregnant after knowing each other for only a month. A few weeks later, that dream dissolved before our eyes.’: Mom suffers 2 miscarriages, gives birth to 2 ‘beautiful rainbow babies’

“I went into shock, paralyzed by what I’d just seen. All of a sudden, I heard a noise I couldn’t recognize. It was coming from me. A deep, loud, moaning scream; the sound of grief and disbelief. We were wheeled up to delivery and I remember a man telling my husband, ‘Good luck and congratulations,’ as he thought we were going to deliver a healthy baby. Never in my wildest dreams did I think we’d ever have to pick an urn for one of our children.”

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