pregnancy announcement

‘To get 2 children, I gave up 2. Creating a baby lost all allure. I was on a mission, detached from the actual act. Every app told me when to breathe, when to baby make. I couldn’t feel joy. It was all fear.’

“I found some elaborate way to share the news with my husband. The handcrafted note around our dog’s neck read, ‘Surprise! You’re going to be a father!’ Then a few weeks later, surprise you’re not. By the 3rd pregnancy, there was no special announcement. I didn’t buy a single item, not even a bib. How could I?”

‘I got with my boyfriend in July. By November, I was pregnant. We had been ‘irresponsible.’ We dealt with it. I convinced myself I’d killed my baby. I couldn’t look at my daughter without crying.’

“The thing is, I also got pregnant many years before at age 24. It was the first time I’d had unprotected sex, and I had split up with the father. Having a termination was my only option. This has hugely troubled me the past 3 years, but I’m not ashamed to talk about it.”

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