“Tears rolled down my face. I went to lie down again and the entire sequence replayed itself. I could hardly believe it. Just like that, we transitioned from ‘recently married’ to ‘patient and caregiver’ and there was no stopping it. We began writing funeral plans.”
‘We were celebrating 3 years of marriage. I thought life couldn’t get any better. When I laid down, I got news no one wants to hear. I ran to the bathroom and hovered over the toilet, dry heaving.’
‘I awoke with a voicemail from the doctor. ‘How did I miss this?’ I raced to the hospital. I got teary eyed, and said to him, ‘I love you, you are going to be ok.’
“I asked, ‘How could that happen so fast?!’ I screamed, ‘You can do this. Fight. I need you. Theo needs you. We can’t do this without you.’ I held his hand but, in my heart, I knew.”
‘Come on, Jenn, you can do this!’ We were going to be parents of not only one little baby, but twins. He was admitted to the hospital just three months before my due date.’
“Justin went to urgent care because his chest was hurting. I could tell by the look on his face that he had bad news to share with me. I remember being in my two-bedroom apartment sobbing uncontrollably and screaming at the top of my lungs.”
‘She took her last breath. I felt her soul leave her body. She made me promise I would be OK. Armed with a map and her ashes, I set off on a journey of a lifetime.’
“She stared off into the distance, and then turned back to me and smiled. She told me, ‘I want you to go. You need to go. You need to be out there… Nature is your cathedral.’ I will never forget those words.”
