“I was in a motel room turning a trick. I had fainted and woke up to this man trying to help me up. Embarrassed, I asked him to leave and went into the bathroom. I was standing at the sink looking into the mirror, and in that moment, I knew.”
‘My mom expected to find me dead. With my son in her arms, she banged and screamed my name. ‘CEIRA!! CEIRA PLEASE!!!,’ she wailed, terrified of what she’d find on the other side.’
‘My boyfriend screwed the windows and doors shut while I was sleeping. I made a split-second decision to throw myself backwards out the window to get away.’
“I woke up and realized something was wrong. I went out into the living room and the look on his face was that of a monster. I tried in vain to get away from him until I eventually found myself pinned between the bed and the wall. The police found him hours later with no recollection of what happened.”
‘Hun, whatcha doing? You ok in there?’ Silence. ‘Hun…?’ I tried turning the knob. Locked. My heartbeat grew faster. My voice got louder. I banged my fists on the door. I couldn’t save him.’
“We went to bed, said our ‘I love you’s.’ He rubbed my back as I drifted off to sleep. At 5:00 a.m., I awoke to use the bathroom. I guess he couldn’t sleep? He wasn’t in bed. He must be downstairs. The TV wasn’t on. No living room lights. Just a faint glow from the bottom of the bathroom door.”
‘This is me the day before I overdosed on heroin. I was almost off probation, a year out of jail, and I had a job.’
“That night, his mom texted me. ‘Do you know if he was using?,’ she asked. ‘I’m concerned. I texted him, but never got an answer back.’ The day before, he had come to my house.”
‘I heard two words: ‘fugitive felon.’ I caught my son’s eye. His shackles made my stomach flutter uncontrollably. His public defender smoothed her beige suit, and approached him.’
“The severely criminal charge was, in fact, a reference to my 24-year-old. I never imagined that term would apply to him. An unexpected call helped me through his transfer to prison. It had been weeks without contact when I answered the unfamiliar number. I fought back tears. He told me how much my son loved me.”
‘I woke up on the floor of a hotel room. My buddy was lying there on the floor next to me. Dead.’
“Why I didn’t die, I have no idea. I suffered a serious head injury that evening. I firmly believe I was hit over the head. All I could think about was my daughter growing up without a father, and my family standing over my casket.”
‘Miss, I have your father’s autopsy results,’ the coroner said. ‘He felt absolutely nothing.’ I quickly asked, ‘It wasn’t an overdose?!’ ‘No drugs were detected, ma’am.’ I cried hysterically.’
“‘We can’t reach him,’ he said. My grandpa was at my dad’s apartment trying to get in. Police arrived. ‘Do we have permission to break in?’ The officer kicked the door down. ‘Dad!,’ my sister screamed. A police officer held our grandpa back. ‘Dana wake him up, get him up!’ All she could say was, ‘Grandpa, I am so sorry.'”
‘Daddy, why does mommy sleep all the time now?’ Things I swore I’d never do, I started doing. ‘Mommy, you asked us the same questions three times!’ My husband begged me.’
“While Carl was out of town, I called him, but I don’t even remember. I knew I’d scared him. He’d felt helpless thousands of miles away while I was home with the kids. For the first time ever, I felt selfish.”
‘If you EVER speak out, I know where the bullets are.’ I walked in the snow for miles in short sleeves. I woke up in the hospital, angry I survived, and pulled out all the hospital tubes.’
“I looked up from my bed and saw my mother and sister at the door. The look in their eyes is something I never want to see again. I feared that I had to be cured. I wish I had seen the warning signs.’
‘I woke with a softball size lump on my neck. I couldn’t breathe. They looked at me like I had 3 heads. Without saying a word, the doctor packs the wound and sends me on my way.’
“I fell asleep. The blood from the gauze had dried to the pillow. When I rolled over, it pulled the gauze out of the fresh wound. I panicked. I went into the bathroom. This was the most insane moment of my existence.”
