“We were looking into adoption. It was dicey. Their mom was doing JUST enough to make it seem like she was on track to get them home, but barely. And then we got the news. We didn’t think much of the warning signs.”
‘Their mom unexpectedly passed. My heart hurt for them, but inside I was glad she wouldn’t fight us for them anymore.’ Family fosters 2 teens who they ‘loved instantly’ despite troubled past
‘Can you take a 6-month-old baby?’ I knew in my heart he was mine. I remember them being less than kind, staring at my arm. ‘What happened to you?’
“‘If my arm didn’t stop me from being a great mom to my biological child, why would it stop me from being a great foster mom?’ I was advised to give up because of my disability. I was heartbroken and had no rights.”
‘He looked me straight in the eye. ‘I’m sure you’re aware this is a FINAL decision. Once I sign off, you cannot change your mind.’ They’re a sibling group of 3, and 2 of them had special needs.’
“‘Morning mama. It’s adoption day.’ Butterflies filled my stomach. The girls and I dolled ourselves up to reflect what was on the inside. Joy and beauty. We went to the courthouse. Then, my lawyer pulled me aside. There had been a miscommunication. My heart dropped.”
‘One mom wrote me after relapsing, again. She was feeling such shame, afraid I would think differently of her.’
“I have been Mama to 12 over the last 4 years. Our family is twisty and tangled. A story of commitment, choice and tragedy.”
‘People assume they have us figured out. The un-ringed left hand, tattoos, a Mama with diverse children, no doubt living off the government.’
“If they only knew.”
‘Deep down I knew I made the wrong call. His foster trauma was inconvenient, and I pushed it aside for my ease. I completely dismissed him.’
“Once my house had fallen quiet, the interaction at the park came flooding back. Tears filled my eyes as I pictured him under the tree all by himself. I felt mad at myself.”
‘At 27, I felt like such a child myself. I laid in bed and sobbed, wondering if I actually had what it took to love the most vulnerable in our city.’
“The orphans, the wounded, the hurting little souls that are our future. I questioned all of it, if I could do this as a single woman.”
‘The phone rings. You recognize the number. Each time it calls you feel a mixture of excitement and fear. Being a foster parent is strange.’
“You never shake the desire to want to help them all. Stepping into this world shows you things you only had heard about in the news. The victims of those new stories suddenly begin sleeping in your home.”
‘At 27, I had become a single foster mom of three overnight’
“I did not have nine months of preparation traditionally associated with child rearing, I had mere hours to prepare.”
A love letter to single foster & adoptive moms
“What kind of woman chooses to upturn her life for someone else’s children?”
