“I remember finally getting the energy to shower, a place where I’d feel so tired that I’d read the shower bottles and stare into space while the water hit my back. I was a zombie. My husband came in and said, ‘It’s time to feed him,’ and I cried.”
‘Mothers don’t shower often. Especially new mothers. When we say this stuff, we are met with horror. But it is the truth.’
‘Dad needs you! There’s water everywhere!’ I run downstairs, my husband is on his knees under the sink, water gushing all over everything! ‘Where’s the valve to shut it off?’ ‘We need the ‘special key!’
“I run outside, half naked, looking around in the moonlight for this shut-off valve… I throw on some clothes and grab my phone to Google. ‘You had time to put on skinny jeans?!?’”
‘I heard ‘save me,’ and then the doorbell rang. I was scared it was someone at the door in trouble. I looked out the window. It was dark, but I could see a shadow.’: Mom recalls hilarious story due to sleep deprivation
“I told him, ‘You need to get up. Someone is at the door and they’re yelling ‘save me.’ His eyes widened and he looked at me like, ‘What?’ I said, ‘Someone is trying to break in!!’”
‘That baby in the photo, the one you can’t see. The one who’s all snuggled up inside her mama. She did not survive.’
“I had been in the hospital for a week being monitored. I was in the safest place that I could be and under constant supervision. And then, it happened.”
‘Before kids you sleep in. After kids you’re whacked in the face at 5 a.m. because you’re someone’s little breakfast making machine because sleep is overrated.’
“Before kids, you make out in your big bed, have a little nasty time and fall asleep lovingly in each other’s arms. After kids, you promise you’ll meet up later and lock the bathroom door for some adult time, but instead you both fall asleep snoring.”
‘Everyone was telling me something was WRONG with my baby and I had to FIX him. So, I OBSESSED about it. Oh, holy night, guys. ENOUGH.’
“I sound harsh, but can we stop? I was that mom, too. With the busy fingers. Googling all the things that could possibly be wrong with my child.”
‘My son still needs to be cuddled to sleep. He’s nearly four. People often ask how I stay so patient. The truth is, I don’t.’: Mom says all she can do is ‘try my best’
“Tantrums. Not sleeping. Overtired. Driving me to the brink of insanity…”
‘I’m about to share a coveted family secret with you. With ears prone to infections and broken eardrums, I use this all the time.’
“Your child ever wake up screaming in pain of an ear infection? Because it takes 30 minutes for pain meds to kick in, this is the handiest trick you will ever learn.”
‘We called it ‘Naughty November.’ We were on a roll for the first 3 days. And then I got my period and lost my mojo. I didn’t want my husband to touch me.’: Mom admits she’s ‘just too damn tired to be intentional about intimacy’
“I hate to admit it, but having sex feels like a chore. I can’t be the only one? I felt like I failed. I would rather just sleep and be alone.”
‘When my kids were babies I fantasized about sleep. In my most desperate times I’d volunteer to be the road the matchbox cars would drive on to shut my eyeballs. I was so tired.’
“Now I’m up until all hours with bigs doing homework, or driving around in my van/taxi all hours. I’m still up at night. You guys there are a million reasons moms aren’t sleeping.”
