sleeping in

‘Single Alex! You’re like a unicorn who doesn’t want to get caught!’ Wait, what?! I DO.’: Woman explains the advantages of being over 30 and single

“I’m 33 years old and single. Here’s the thing: my life doesn’t start in motion when my husband arrives. My life is in motion. Period. My husband will arrive. Period. I’m not the woman back in the village hopelessly waiting for the hero. I AM the hero, too. I am doing the work to make my life worthy of the epic woman I am…AND the epic man I deserve.”

‘UM, IAN. Cough. IAN!’ I expected a box of pizza on the floor. I found foot-tall flames.’: Mom recalls dangerous fire pet dog accidentally caused before 6 a.m.

“I hear the sound of a huge dog clambering down the wood floor hallway. If toddler silence is a dangerous sound, this is the doggy equivalent. I chased her around the house trying to dislodge a slice of Meat Lovers. Then I saw the flames. The kids come running in. ‘FIRE! FIRE! WHAT’S OUR ESCAPE PLAN?’ We don’t have one, but bet we do by this afternoon.”

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