“I called our agency and said, ‘YES! Tell us all you can.’ We were told she might not ever walk. The lower portion of her body had not properly formed in the womb. She was missing her sacrum and bottom 3 vertebrae. Her little intestines were blocked. ‘Can you be in India in four days?’ Something in us knew this precious girl was ours.”
‘I gasped in the CVS parking lot. The file read, ‘Child Reserved.’ My hands shook as I waited for my husband. I tried not to peek. Then, we saw the face that took our breath away.’: Couple adopt special needs child, ‘She has forever changed our hearts!’
‘How do you send a child who doesn’t understand personal space, let alone social cues, back to school?’: Special needs mom says ‘I trust we will all make the best decision for our family’
“What do you do when you have a child who explores the world around him by touching and feeling everything he sees? Last night, I broke down. All the thoughts and emotions came pouring out of me on my bedroom floor. As a parent of a child with a disability, NOTHING can prepare us to make the type of decisions we are all abruptly facing.”
‘We’re so lucky your dad still has his job.’ I don’t know how we’ll do it another day, another week, another year.’: Mom of special needs son says ‘being his caregiver is a whole life job’
“Most children don’t depend on their parents for everything their entire lives. We always worry about illness. He’s nonverbal, cannot walk, has a feeding tube, and recently has been diagnosed with a seizure disorder. But then, I look at Christopher and smile.”
10 Things Special Needs Parents Wish They Had
“We always expect our kids with special needs to learn how to live in a world that wasn’t made for them, but we never ask the people around them to learn more about how to live in theirs.”
‘Because of autism, my daughter doesn’t know her beautiful brown skin is a threat in this world.’: Mom to daughter with autism says ‘I must worry about protecting her’
“Because of autism, I don’t have to explain the growing list of hashtags. Because of autism, I must worry about protecting my nonverbal child from authorities who don’t understand she will not comprehend or obey verbal orders.”
‘We’ve known for over a year our sweet toddler struggles from the effects of alcohol during pregnancy. He’s one of the ‘lucky’ ones.’: Mom realizes ‘I am a special needs mom and it’s hard’
“I didn’t want to be that mom. Then, Covid hit and it closed our developmental daycare my 2-year-old attends. And things got real.”
‘Riley is now 6 years old. He still does not speak. I always thought words were what mattered.’: Mom to son with autism says ‘I was lucky to be in his world, I just didn’t know it yet’
“Waiting for Riley to ‘tell’ me he loves me. Waiting for him to say mommy. Waiting for him to speak. How I wished I could get a moment in his head. When in reality what I really needed to do is take a step back and see was he showed me love in ways that don’t need words.”
‘What happens to my girl when society realizes it’s not ‘cute’ anymore? How do I make people see the beauty I see?’: Mom to daughter with autism urges us to challenge our idea of beauty
“When she was 2, she didn’t talk. She said one word, ‘Hi,’ over and over. I was worried, but most agreed it was so cute. At 4, she stuffed food in her mouth messily. Gosh, it was cute. At 6, she was diagnosed. Everyone agreed she was still cute, but followed with smiles of pity. Now, she’s 11. She picks her nose, sits with her legs wide open. She has body odor, speech delays, and drools. What happens to my girl when society decides it’s not ‘cute’ anymore?”
‘At least he doesn’t…’ As a special needs parent, I hear this all the time. Each one takes a little slice out of me I can’t fill back in.’: Special needs mom urges you to ‘validate’ those who ‘give you a glimpse of their challenges’
“I don’t let very many people into our lives, mostly because I’m spent. And one of the reasons is because of things like ‘at least.’ When you ‘at least’ me as a complex parent, I feel minimized. I feel unheard. I feel compared. If a person gives you a glimpse of their challenges, honor their experience. Validate them. Meet them where they are. And if you can’t think of anything else to say, ‘Can I get you coffee or tea?’ always works.”
‘Please, sit with us. Text us. Stop by and insist on taking our kids for the day because I promise we won’t ask for help. But mama, we need it.’: Mom says all a special needs parent needs is for you to ‘show up’
“When you ask a special needs parent how they’ve been and they roll their eyes, yawn, and say, ‘Eh, it’s been rough, honestly.’ It might be our pride or that we feel guilty. If you have been wondering how you can help, know that it is simple. Show up. Keep showing up.”
