special needs parent

‘I gasped in the CVS parking lot. The file read, ‘Child Reserved.’ My hands shook as I waited for my husband. I tried not to peek. Then, we saw the face that took our breath away.’: Couple adopt special needs child, ‘She has forever changed our hearts!’

“I called our agency and said, ‘YES! Tell us all you can.’ We were told she might not ever walk. The lower portion of her body had not properly formed in the womb. She was missing her sacrum and bottom 3 vertebrae. Her little intestines were blocked. ‘Can you be in India in four days?’ Something in us knew this precious girl was ours.”

‘How do you send a child who doesn’t understand personal space, let alone social cues, back to school?’: Special needs mom says ‘I trust we will all make the best decision for our family’

“What do you do when you have a child who explores the world around him by touching and feeling everything he sees? Last night, I broke down. All the thoughts and emotions came pouring out of me on my bedroom floor. As a parent of a child with a disability, NOTHING can prepare us to make the type of decisions we are all abruptly facing.”

‘What happens to my girl when society realizes it’s not ‘cute’ anymore? How do I make people see the beauty I see?’: Mom to daughter with autism urges us to challenge our idea of beauty

“When she was 2, she didn’t talk. She said one word, ‘Hi,’ over and over. I was worried, but most agreed it was so cute. At 4, she stuffed food in her mouth messily. Gosh, it was cute. At 6, she was diagnosed. Everyone agreed she was still cute, but followed with smiles of pity. Now, she’s 11. She picks her nose, sits with her legs wide open. She has body odor, speech delays, and drools. What happens to my girl when society decides it’s not ‘cute’ anymore?”

‘At least he doesn’t…’ As a special needs parent, I hear this all the time. Each one takes a little slice out of me I can’t fill back in.’: Special needs mom urges you to ‘validate’ those who ‘give you a glimpse of their challenges’

“I don’t let very many people into our lives, mostly because I’m spent. And one of the reasons is because of things like ‘at least.’ When you ‘at least’ me as a complex parent, I feel minimized. I feel unheard. I feel compared. If a person gives you a glimpse of their challenges, honor their experience. Validate them. Meet them where they are. And if you can’t think of anything else to say, ‘Can I get you coffee or tea?’ always works.”

‘Please, sit with us. Text us. Stop by and insist on taking our kids for the day because I promise we won’t ask for help. But mama, we need it.’: Mom says all a special needs parent needs is for you to ‘show up’

“When you ask a special needs parent how they’ve been and they roll their eyes, yawn, and say, ‘Eh, it’s been rough, honestly.’ It might be our pride or that we feel guilty. If you have been wondering how you can help, know that it is simple. Show up. Keep showing up.”

 Share  Tweet