suicidal

‘I was accused of murder. Twice.’: Mother of 6 recalls murder accusations brought against her after gaining custody of half-brother in wake of parent’s deaths

“My father signed over custody to me. The judge granted it one day before he died. We were settling into our new lives when I heard a knock at my door. A USPS worker handed me a certified envelope. I read the horrific accusations. Homicide. Someone is saying I murdered my father. Murdered. That I killed him. Me. His daughter. I hit my knees, sobbing, wanting to die. ‘This is it. I’m going to be arrested.’ I was petrified. What if someone actually believes this?”

‘Do you have a son in Idaho?’ I instantly knew my son was gone. He took his life after a silly argument.’: Father says son’s death by suicide feels ‘unreal’ after his struggle with mental illness, alcohol and substance abuse

“I heard a knock on my door. I opened and saw a young policeman. He told me he had a phone number I needed to call. I quickly realized we had trouble. The officer claimed he didn’t know what it was about (doubtful). I called the number – it was answered by a person at the Boise morgue.”

‘No one asked if I was OK.’ I was 15 when I attempted suicide. I went to church, sat alone. I cried the entire service.’: Woman urges Christians to discuss mental health, ‘you don’t need to hide it’

“It was a Sunday afternoon. I cried for the WHOLE service. I sat alone in a row towards the back. I was told by my Pastor if I attempted suicide, I would go to hell. I was told by my elder I was beyond reaching, not worth saving – I had fallen too far for God to find me. Trusted friends told me if I had stronger faith and prayed more, I wouldn’t need anti-depressants. I was told my depression was a result of my sin. But as far as I knew, my only repeated offense was existing.”

‘I broke things off with my husband. It was a shock to my family. I hid my unhappiness well. Then I met Sean.’: Teen bride finds ‘unconditional love’ after realizing she didn’t want to be ‘pastor’s wife,’ is ‘grateful for second chance at happiness’

“I was 18 when I married my high school sweetheart. I hesitantly resigned myself to becoming a youth pastor’s wife, and told myself I’d learn to bake casseroles and become the epitome of domesticity. I told myself this was who I was. I never anticipated the crash.”

‘My brother started the ‘naked man’ game when I was 6. I felt so empty I thought I might just float away.’: Woman overcomes sexual trauma, now uses kindness as an ‘act of rebellion’

“I walked home in a dress, but no underwear. I told my mom and dad I was staying with a friend, and then went into the operating room to have my right fallopian tube removed along with the baby that would never be. I went home the next day and said, ‘I feel like I have the flu’ and went straight to bed. My cry for help didn’t work. Nobody noticed. Nobody asked if I was okay. I knew if I didn’t start fighting for myself, I’d end up dead.”

‘I found his gun while blacked out. I held it to my head, trying to pull the trigger. His roommate ripped it away.’: Woman’s life has changed ‘drastically’ since becoming sober, turned her ‘nightmare’ into a ‘blessing’

“I felt awful, like I had hundreds of other mornings. But this day, something was different. My friend told me a story of my actions. While blacked out, I ran behind the bar where my ex worked. I started hitting him. Something in me snapped. THAT was my breaking point. It was the straw that broke the camel’s back. I was quiet for a moment, then I said with tears in my eyes, ‘That’s it. I’m done.’”

‘I bought a rope and began to hang myself.’ I was living a fantasy of mine. I didn’t see myself living past 30.’: Young woman survives addiction, multiple suicide attempts, says suffering has been her ‘greatest teacher’

“I was addicted to the act of numbing myself from the anxiety. I was so desperately seeking attention outside myself, not knowing I needed to learn to give it to myself. I have tried everything in my power to end my life. And, guess what? Nothing worked. Hi, I am still here! Life has seasons, just like us. What’s a sunny day without the dark clouds and rain?”

‘Please, when I wake up, change me into a boy.’ I’d make deals with God and wake up excited. Nothing changed.’: Transgender man finally ‘at peace,’ loves who he sees ‘looking back in the mirror’

“Growing up, there was this football field behind my house. I’d go there and lie down in the middle of the it, looking up at the sky and begging God to strike me with a lightning bolt. And just change me. Change my body. Every day I did this, and woke up sobbing. I didn’t have a word for how I felt. I knew I was attracted to women. But I also knew I felt like a boy trapped in a girl’s body.”

‘Why did you cut her?! She didn’t give you permission to do that.’ My blood boiled. He just stared, his face blank.’: Doctor performs episiotomy on mother without her permission during childbirth because he had ‘somewhere to be at 7 p.m.’

“Snnniiipppp. My doctor used scissors to cut me open ‘down there’ to make it easier to push the baby out. ‘What did you do?!’ I asked the male, 50-year-old doctor, with fear in my voice. Even the nurses paused. Just 30 minutes before, my doctor told me, ‘I have somewhere to be at 7 o’ clock, so you better be able to push this baby out soon.’ My husband’s rage was rising. I squeezed his hand. ‘We can’t do this now.’”

‘I was a single mom, had 3 fatherless WILD boys, and major baggage. But my daughter is destined for great purpose.’: Mom finally ‘blessed’ with baby girl after 3 boys as a single mother, teen pregnancy

“Single motherhood was rough. The judgement was hard, and I lost friends. Having 3 children while unmarried is frowned upon, especially here in the south. People never took the time to find out why I had 3 children this way, because they had their own assumptions. I didn’t think I’d find someone who’d want to marry me. Then I met Josey. 5 months later, we were married. The emotion was too much. Finally, a daughter.”

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