“I left the office with a smile on my face. I brought my son back to the car and teared up as I put him in. I refused to cry in front of him. I couldn’t show him I was scared. ‘Autism.’ As soon as they said it, my breath caught. I acted cool and collected. I acted like it was all to be expected. I acted. For everyone else’s benefit.”
‘He wasn’t walking or talking. I chalked it up to an overactive sister who adored getting everything for him. The pediatrician agreed, so I left.’: After autism diagnosis, Mom ‘mourns the loss of a son I never had, but will never stop fighting’
‘Your future husband is 2 years old. Will he tell me, ‘Mom, she’s the one!’? It’s hard to believe my place as his mother will be eclipsed by your place as his wife.’
“I will recognize my son’s loyalty is first to you. I will refrain from gossiping about you to family members. I will not harbor a grudge if you tell me, ‘I’m sorry, but we just can’t make that work right now.'”
‘I got a text from my mom. It said ‘Hey Crystal, give me a call when you get a chance, when the kids aren’t around, you’re not driving and not going to work.’ I knew right away it wasn’t going to be great news.’
“I went to the only place I knew I could actually be alone, and able to talk without little ears around. I sat in my car, in the driveway and I dialed my phone, my mom answered, and we had the conversation. The one that you never want to have.”
‘That’s when he told me. This stranger, this man I’d never seen before, wanted to hold the door open for us. He didn’t think he’d ever be able to again. He shouldn’t have even been alive.’
“’I don’t take walking for granted anymore.’ Those are the powerful words he uttered to me. I’d noticed him walking along the sidewalk as we approached the glass doors, but I didn’t expect him to yell for me to wait, to beg me to allow him to hold that door for us.”
‘While waiting to board our plane, my daughter was being her inquisitive self, meeting and saying ‘Hi’ to everyone she could, until she walked up on this man.’
“This wasn’t a short, little exchange.”
Talking with kids about emotions in daily life
“When parents talk about a wide range of emotions, kids learn to understand their own emotions and those of other people.”
