“‘How much longer are you willing to live like this?’ My mind screamed. This CHRISTIAN counselor was introducing the option of me leaving my husband. ‘He is a narcissist. This won’t stop.’ He was driving extremely fast and irresponsibly down the highway. I was crying, begging him to stop. Then he’d take pride in being the one to ‘comfort’ me. I didn’t believe in divorce. What were my options? Lifelong suffering? It dawned on me – I was being treated horribly. I deserved so much better.”
“No one can see if I’m on the phone, cooking, sweeping the floor, or even standing on my head in the corner. Some days I’m only a pair of hands, nothing more! ‘Can you fix this? Can you tie this? Can you open this?’ I’m a clock to ask, ‘What time is it?’ A satellite guide to answer, ‘What number is the Disney Channel?’ I’m the invisible mom.”
“This is your reality. Your mother is more like a long distant cousin. Your friends bond with their moms over ‘The Bachelor.’ They could talk for hours about decorating the same way Joanna Gaines does. But you can’t do that. Your mom barely has a maternal bone in her body. She dropped you off at college and barely hugged you goodbye, thankful you were finally out of her house.”
“I definitely don’t want to hang out with the friend who tells me my husband walked about because there was obviously something wrong with me. My best friend, my soul sister, told me ‘I can’t even keep my life together’ because I was not able to keep my marriage together. Ouch.”
“In all my years of attending socials and dinners, I always remember that when the main course was being cleared, someone would inevitably lean over and say, ‘Keep your fork.’ It was my favorite part because I knew something better was coming, like velvety chocolate cake or deep-dish apple pie. The next time you reach down for your fork let it remind you, the best is yet to come.”
“I blacked out, refusing to leave the shop. My husband had to carry me out. I woke up to use the bathroom the next day, but I didn’t make it. I fainted. It was the scariest thing I’ve ever experienced. I panicked. ‘I can’t see!’ My temperature was dropping. He called an ambulance. My parents had just brought our kids home and here I was, being taken out on a stretcher. I could not make my children witness such a horror. I HAD TO STOP.”
“I proceeded with my plan to be Susie Homemaker meets Carol Brady. But no one was around to witness it. I was with another human all day, but felt horribly unseen. I was over-touched, but not talked to enough. I’d been constantly moving, but never really exercised my mind. I often found myself staring at the clock, willing the magical sound of the garage door to arrive.”
“I was horrified recently to find out many fully-grown women in my life didn’t know all the names for their own anatomy! As ADULTS, they had never learned. My children are 5, 7, and 8. They know all about consent, menstruation, sex, pedophiles, puberty, and more. In our family, we view these conversations as a ladder to safety. I’d rather them know the facts than to ‘learn’ from the playground or internet.”
“Four of us who grew up together used to take a girl’s weekend every year. Laura was the first to get married and the first to have a baby. We were sitting in our hotel room as she pumped her milk. The rest of us, not yet moms, were mesmerized. That crazy machine was singing, ‘a little bit more, a little bit more.’ If you pumped, you know what I’m talking about. She was actually going through all of this while on VACATION. We stared at her baffled.”
“He was a super chill baby and we thought we had it MADE. I started to notice the other little boys’ interactions with their moms. I began to get worried. I didn’t think anything was different about Landon at first, I just thought I was not a good enough mom. I thought I wasn’t teaching him these little things well enough. This was our first child and we didn’t know any different.”
