“I saw my mom inject heroin. When the social workers came, I would hide all her needles. I didn’t want to be labeled ‘the foster child’ at school. When I turned 12, only 2 couples came forward wanting to adopt me. I felt like I was betraying my mom. I no longer wanted to be here, and inhaled poisonous fumes. But now I know why I’ve had this life.”
“I was waiting to pre-board a plane with my two young children when another passenger grabbed my shoulder. She told me I needed to wait for family boarding. I responded it was indeed our turn to go. ‘How’d you manage that?’ she asked. ‘We have different circumstances,’ I replied.”
“I was addicted to heroin at 15. It was no longer enjoyable. No longer an escape, but a hell I was creating for myself. Maybe a few seconds of serenity, then reality always slapped me in the face. I’d feel so guilty about the damage I was causing to people that loved me, the pain I was inflicting on myself, the hatred and anger I felt from all the things I had no control over. I thought this was the only way to feel this good. That little heartbeat was the sound of a chapter of my life closing.”
“She was innocently attempting to make sense of us 3. I followed up quickly. ‘I had nothing to do with it,’ I said, winking at the mother of my child. Nicole, his birth mom, responded with her trademark wisdom. ‘I’ll take credit for his good looks,’ she whispered. ‘You can take credit for his smile.’”
“A counselor I met with looked at me and asked this simple question. ‘Would Albert want you to grieve with fear, or grieve with hope?’ I immediately knew the answer. As I sat there on the couch, tears streaming down my face, I knew I needed to live. Just because Albert died, doesn’t mean I have to as well. That would be the last thing he would want me to do.”
“I wrapped my arms around her, kissed her head, and told her I love her. Her arms tightened around me. We stood there quietly, and then her words came in a rush. She has struggled with friendships. I hate this for her. Then, she sobs.”
“I remember vividly the first time Anna opened her eyes. She stared with such intent that I couldn’t bring myself to look away. The swelling from her eye lids had finally gone, and she opened her eyes and stared directly at me. I get mesmerized by the beauty in her skin. I know she was made for something special.”
“I got a call that my 3-year-old had been left at Disney daycare at 2 a.m. The daycare worker called the police. My husband was a master manipulator. This was the last straw. We fled to another state. One night, I got a knock on my apartment door. The door NO ONE knew where I was. My ex was released from jail 2 days prior. With every being in my bones, I knew it was him.”
“My son kept holding his right side and screaming. They told me he was ‘just constipated’. ‘Constipation shouldn’t be making him scream.’ They thought I was some crazy helicopter mom. The doctor’s response? ‘Well, if it was real pain, you holding and consoling him wouldn’t be making him feel better like it is now.’ Boy, was she wrong. I could feel in my spirit something was wrong with my baby boy.”
“I awoke to the worst kind of alarm clock: a thud. My healthy, 31-year old husband hitting the floor. When his heart stopped, and his body dropped, he didn’t just fall gracefully to the ground. He hit our bedside table and broke his back. That break restarted his heart. Miracle.”
