“I don’t have that same twinkle in my eye. I can no longer give him my full attention like I used to. My energy goes into playing hot wheels and throwing together loads of laundry. We share half-hearted conversations as we each scroll through stupid Facebook videos at the end of a long day. I pour so much of myself into every area of my life that my husband often gets the drips of what is left. It’s not fair. But I’m thankful.”
“We are expected to work like we don’t have children and raise children like we don’t have careers.”
“They have been unable to find a reason why this happened. I didn’t go out of the country while pregnant, I wasn’t exposed to Zika. He didn’t have a stroke in utero, and there is no gene to blame. We had no idea there was anything wrong before he was born. His whole life has been an emotional whirlwind. I wouldn’t have chosen this for him or for us, but I wouldn’t change it either.”
“Right after I turned 15, I met the absolute love of my life. Apparently, we were never really exclusive. In the summer going into my senior year, I got pregnant. I learned alcohol numbed the pain. After my daughter’s father left without telling me, I started partying more. He had no more fight in him. Days after his 4th birthday, we brought him home on hospice care.”
“This was the tough part for me. Thinking back to how I grew up, and seeing how drastically different it was from them, broke my heart. As a kid, I remember asking for updated decor for my room or a new, more comfortable bed to sleep in, and my parents working their butts off to make it a reality for me. But these kids didn’t have that.”
“I don’t even recognize myself. I look tired. I look like I’ve let myself go. I look angry. I look really rushed. I know I’m a good mom. I don’t doubt myself in that department. But I also feel like all I am is a mom sometimes.”
“My family is very against medicine and doctors. My parents still don’t know I went to the doctor, or that I attend therapy regularly now. I don’t know what they would do, honestly. It’s ridiculous I need to hide going to the doctor, especially when it’s for my brain. My roommate was sharing how she couldn’t get out of bed. ‘It’s like someone placed you into a blank room, with no furniture or door or windows, and they expect you to thrive in it.’ It all clicked.”
“My obstetrician had to do another ultrasound just to see it with his own eyes.”
“When group members told her to treat the symptoms with everything from breastmilk to thyme, to elderberry, to sliced potatoes; the mom agreed.”
“When the news of divorce was trickling through the household, I came back from a long bike ride to find Mom talking with Dad, her eyes swollen and red from crying hard. She saw me, brightened, and cheerfully asked me all about my adventure that day — hiding her heartache for my sake.”
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