“I pried the toy out of her arms, her screaming like I actually removed a limb, me trying not to hurt her, wondering if she was actually Thor because of her freakishly strong grip. I hauled Aspen out of the store underneath my arm, her legs kicking. I looked at her in the backseat, and wondered if I’d done the right thing.”
“It is my greatest joy, even when I feel tired instead of blessed. I would choose you and choose this life a million times again.”
“I started to let fear creep into my mind. We came from two totally different worlds. Ryan was an Eagle Scout, never once touched drugs or alcohol, saved himself for his future wife… aka virgin. I was broken, just finished fighting cancer, recently divorced, teen mom, made so many mistakes. He seemed too good to be true. I thought, ‘Surely this will all end.'”
“I lost my best friend. ‘What am I supposed to do now?’ All I’d ever known was taking care of my mother. Suddenly, I felt a tightness in my chest. ‘Well here is the panic attack I’ve been waiting for since she died.’ I arrive at the ER. The doctor came in. I remembered her. She was the doctor who admitted my mom. My heart rate shot up in panic. I looked her right in the eyes. ‘You can’t put me in Room 6. My mom just died there last week.’”
“Yeah, you read that right. Making the shopping list for this holiday season, I couldn’t help but think what my daughter got for Christmas last year. Her gifts ended up smashed at the bottom of an overstuffed, dusty box. She barely plays with them. I’m avoiding that this year. I emailed, texted relatives with the news. I crossed my fingers and prayed everyone would understand.”
“I signed my 1-year-old daughter up for a local early children center. My coworker shook her head in disbelief. ‘Your husband must make a lot of money, because I send my kids to an in-home daycare. It’s like, two-thirds of the price!’ My husband and I are teachers, so clearly we’re not in it for the fat paychecks. As the $700 monthly bills continued to roll in, I was tempted.”
“I said, ‘I love you,’ and she didn’t say it back. You lose so much of the person along the way that by the end, you are practically begging for them to die. But at the same time, you dread the thought of it. I say, ‘See ya later,’ and she says, ‘Alligator.’ You can’t tell me she’s not still in there.”
“It was 6 months post my 4th open heart surgery. I was celebrating turning 26, a milestone my mother and doctors never thought I’d reach. That night, I met Ryan. ‘You don’t want to be interested in me. I have a lot of baggage.’ He replied, ‘What do you mean?’ ‘I’m probably going to die soon.’ Within 8 months, we were engaged. Not everyone approved of us looking for a surrogate, you know, because ‘I might die soon.’”
“When a dancer dances during labor, you all love the idea that she is doing what she loves, but when a makeup artist does her makeup during labor, you mom-shame her?”
“It was time for Nick’s body to be taken away. Ryan and I hadn’t yet told the kids. In a choked up voice, he broke the news. I held Fayth and Noah. We sat there and cried in silence. His dad put his hand on his shoulder. ‘I’m here, bud.’”
