“Before I lost my Mom if you had asked me what my idea of the best day ever looked like it would look a lot different than it would today.
I would have told you it would be a day spent with a group of friends. The larger the crowd, the better. Honestly any friends, friends of friends, friends that cared about me and friends that could have cared less, a day spent making sure I was busy from beginning until end, a day that ended really late and started late, a day spent worrying about the next day not realizing we are never promised them so worrying about it was pointless., a day on my phone talking to friends, a day filled with nothing more than wasted time.
I would have told you that was my idea of the best day ever before my Mom died.
Ask me than now and you will get a different answer. An answer that looks nothing like the other one. My idea of the best day ever starts off with hearing the sound of little feet running across the hardwood floors to wake me up first thing in the morning like it’s their job.
Then it’s a phone call from my Mom asking if she can come over. I wouldn’t need to talk to anyone else that day, just her. It’s a day filled with melt downs, smiles, little giggles, sleeping babies, burnt breakfast that was made with the best of intentions and then a knock on the door right at the perfect moment with my Mom on the other side.
It’s a day spent with family, a day spent with friends that love my kids like their own and love me regardless of my past or my flaws, a day spent knowing my circle looks a lot smaller these days but it’s filled with so much love that I can’t imagine it any other way. a day spent living a pretty mediocre life but one that’s got lots of meaning, a slow day, not with any plans just moments and memories with the ones I love the most, a day that ends at home rocking my babies to sleep or tucking them in so soundly.
You see I lost a lot of me the day I lost my Mom. She took a lot with her the day she died but in losing her I gained a whole new perspective on life.
That’s something I couldn’t have gained if grief hadn’t come into my life and showed me what the best day ever really looks like.”
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